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Enter Madame 



Enter lada 



Gilda Varesi 



Gilda Varesi 
From the original drawing by W. T. Benda 



§niwBib l£fl 






Enter Madame 

A Play in Three Acts 

By 
Gilda Varesi and Dolly Byrne 



Introduction by 
Alexander Woollcott 



Frontispiece by 
W. T. Benda 



G. P. Putnam's Sons 

New York and London 

Gbe fmfcfeerbocfcer fcress 

1921 






Copyright, 1921 

BY 

G. P. PUTNAM'S SONS 



SL& 




MAR I I I d <L 1 Printed in the United States of America 



§>CI.A60S648 



Produced by 
Brock Pemberton 
with the following cast 



Gerald Fitzgerald 

Madame 's husband . . Mr. Norman Trevor 

Mrs. Flora Preston 

A widow Miss Jane Meredith 

Tamamoto 

Mr. Fitzgerald's servant . Mr. George Moto 

John Fitzgerald 

His son Mr. Gavin Muir 

Aline Chalmers 

John's fiancee .... Miss Sheila Hayes 

Bice 

Madame's maid . . . Miss Michelette Burani 

The Doctor 

Her personal physician. . Mr. Francis M. Verdi 

Miss Smith 

Her secretary .... Miss Minnie Milne 

Archimede 

Her chef Mr. William E.Hallman 

Madame Lisa Della 

Robbia Miss Gilda Varesi 

Albert Bannister, Stage Manager. 



FOREWORD 

On a sweltering evening in mid- August, 
1920 — a night of rumbling thunder and 
wilted collars and ruined dispositions — 
this comedy called Enter Madame slipped 
quietly into New York by way of the then 
idle Garrick Theatre and immediately estab- 
lished itself as one of those happy plays which 
cause stampedes at the box office. The fame 
of it spread with unusual rapidity. Pilgrims 
to the great city always arrive with one hand 
guarding their luggage and the other extend- 
ing a slip of paper, on which they have jotted 
down the names of the pieces they intend (or 
rather hope) to see during their visit. Long 
before the aforesaid hot spell had entirely 
abated, it was noted by the sensitive ticket 
agents that one play was recurring persist- 



Foreword 

ently in all those aspiring lists. That play 
was Enter Madame. 

Whereat there was rejoicing among all 
those who like to see whatever is fine-grained 
and creditable to the theatre greeted with 
that kind of overwhelming popular support 
which the pessimists insist is always reserved 
for what is gross and cheap and tawdry — 
great rejoicing, indeed, among those who 
knew, or came to know, something of the 
story that lay behind the writing and the 
acting of it. Such back-stage snooping as this 
implies is often disillusionizing and almost 
always unwarrantably intrusive. But some 
glance into what might be called the personal 
history of Enter Madame is justified because 
it involves not only the manner but the 
matter of the play. 

It is a motley story, one that pokes back a 
hundred years among the dusty laurels of 
Italian opera, makes such ambitious leaps as 
a journey from Rome to Chicago involves, 
and sketches, in shadowy outline, the tragic 
vi 



Foreword 

figure of one for whom the brilliant and satis- 
fying premiere of Enter Madame came just 
too late. 

This play was written by Gilda Varesi and 
Dolly Byrne, though, in its earliest days, the 
identity of Varesi herself as one of its authors 
was discreetly hidden behind the nom de 
plume of Giulia Conti. The Madame who 
enters (and exits) like a dazzling and some- 
what disturbing comet is a world-famous 
prima donna, a spoiled, petted, whimsical, 
stormy lady whose alternating tenderness and 
tantrums make up what is most easily de- 
scribed and dismissed as a comedy of tem- 
perament — just as if that loose description 
did not fit nearly every comedy which sur- 
vives in the theatre. 

This Madame Delia Robbia is just such 
another first lady of Italian opera as was 
Elena Varesi, whose sweet voice and unfor- 
gettable charm made her welcome every 
season in all the citadels of opera from Berlin 
to London. Elena Varesi reigned in the 
vii 



Foreword 

eighties, herself the daughter of the great 
Felice Varesi for whom the baritone role in 
Rigoletto was written and the granddaughter 
of that enchanting Luigia Boccabadotti who 
was such a favourite in Rome in the days 
when Chateaubriand was writing enthusias- 
tically about her to Madame Recamier in 
Paris. It was of such glory that Gilda Varesi, 
Elena Varesi 's older daughter, trailed the 
clouds when she came into the world. 

Now, her most vivid memories of her 
mother are of a radiant lady, who, when her 
tours permitted and she happened to feel that 
way, used occasionally to sweep down on 
startled Milan where her two daughters had 
been installed under the wing of a formidable 
nurse. There would be a shower of gracious 
gifts and endearments and maternal solicitude 
crowded into a few exciting days and then the 
prima donna would go whirling on in her 
course, perhaps to take the baths at Aix, per- 
haps to burst on London for a dazzling, fondly 
cherished engagement at Coven t Garden, 
viii 



Foreword 

Sila Varesi, the younger daughter, is even 
now singing in Milan. That Gilda Varesi, 
who gave no operatic promise whatever, did 
not grow up to grace some provincial stock 
company in her native Italy is due to the fact 
that Madame Varesi, when the loss of her 
voice through illness banished her from opera, 
was minded to migrate to some distant land 
lest she be for ever tormented with the memo- 
ries of the glories that had passed. Somehow, 
she hit upon Chicago as an exceedingly distant 
land and there she set up shop as a teacher of 
singing, that twilight of opera wherein dwell 
those who have sung their last r61es surrounded 
by those who have yet to sing their first. 

When the book of Gilda Varesi's life comes 
to be written, instead of being darkly fore- 
shadowed in a mere preface, it will have to 
tell something of those early Chicago days; of 
lessons learned arduously at a school of elocu- 
tion and as arduously unlearned in the actual 
theatre; of Desdemona's grief conned in 
secret and roared aloud in the woods to the 
ix 



Foreword 

natural agitation of the birds and squirrels. 
It will recount the first earnest efforts under 
Ben Greet, when the young novice played 
even the mob so strenuously that Mark 
Antony quite pardonably raged at the diffi- 
culty of co-operating with a Roman populace 
that would persist in sitting on the corpse of 
Caesar. It will describe the first meeting 
Madame Varesi reluctantly arranged with 
Modjeska, who heard the young aspirant out 
in stately silence and engaged her for the next 
season, but at the same time pronounced the 
following doom: "She is thin and homely 
and an artist. On all three counts, the Ameri- 
can theatre will have none of her." If that 
story is ever really written, it will — it 
must — suggest something of the inex- 
pressible pathos of a dethroned opera singer, 
grown old and stout in threadbare exile, but 
still trying gallantly to recapture for her wide- 
eyed daughter's instruction something of the 
secret and the fire of a dimly remembered 
triumph at far-off Co vent Garden. 



Foreword 

There will be tales of comic adventures on 
tour with the veteran Modjeska. It will try 
— probably in vain — to reproduce something 
of the curious impression that must have been 
made in semi-rural communities by "Mary 
Stuart, " when that German poet's foray into 
English history was translated and valiantly 
enacted by a Polish Mary and an Italian Bess. 

It will tell of the lucky meeting with Mrs. 
Fiske and of the lessons learned in that most 
nourishing of all dramatic schools — Mrs. 
Fiske's company. It will tell of her little 
triumph as the Italian woman of the tene- 
ments in Salvation Nell, a role that came to 
her when she was still in her early twenties. 
Of course that shining success doomed her, in 
a theatre which has a besetting passion for 
reproduction, to a wearying succession of just 
such scrawny tornadoes and season after 
season slipped by without the chance ever 
coming for her to play a protagonistic r61e or 
even what the people of the show shop call a 
straight one. It is true that in her capacity 
xi 



Foreword 

as the greatest and most dangerous American 
understudy she was able to play for a little 
time the roles of Modjeska in Macbeth, Doris 
Keane in Romance, and John Barrymore in 
The Jest. And these were feathers in her 
cap, bright feathers, but they adorned a cap she 
was obliged to wear when no one was looking. 

So it was not until Enter Madame was pro- 
duced — and this play of hers and Mrs. 
Byrne's got its hearing at all, thanks to the 
enthusiasm of Brock Pemberton, who, in 
directing and presenting it, made his debut 
as a producer — that Varesi really came 
into her own. Mind you, this account of her 
twelve years' struggle is not intended to be 
read with the tremolo stop out. Mere ab- 
sence of stardom is not acutely pathetf.c. 
During those twelve years, the theatre sup- 
plied Varesi with praise and enough to eat, 
which is all any one needs in this world. Her 
prestige was sufficient to satisfy any one — 
except, perhaps, Elena Varesi. 

Madame Varesi had sternly opposed this 
xii 



Foreword 

daughter of hers even attempting the stage, 
so vivid were her own time-enhanced memo- 
ries of its heartaches. She had believed the 
post of an obscure school-teacher more to be 
desired than that of an obscure actress— 
certainly for a Varesi. The occasional rap- 
tures of the London and New York critics, 
which must have been relayed on to her in 
Chicago, may have pleased her, but they 
probably did not satisfy her. We shall never 
know, but we may always guess, that she 
thought them paltry reward for one whose 
very great-grandmother had been very great 
indeed. 

Enter Madame was produced in August, 
1920. Elena Varesi, who had been its in- 
spiration in more senses than one, did not see 
it nor read of its reverberant success. Death 
had released her in June of that year. 

Alexander Woollcott. 



xin 



CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Act I 3 

Act II 69 

Act III 138 



ILLUSTRATIONS 

PAGE 

Gilda Varesi . . Frontispiece 

Gerald: " You see, my life with you has 

been colorful, but snatchy" . . 56 

Lisa: "He has broken my heart! I only 

wanted to be loved " ... 66 

Gerald: "It was a great little life while 

it lasted" ..... 108 

"To Life, that outruns Chance and Love 
and Death! To Life, the winner of 
the race!" 112 



xvu 



ENTER MADAME 



ACT I 

A bachelor library in an Apartment Hotel in 
Boston. At R. a mantel flanked by two 
windows. In front of it a comfortable chair. 
On the mantelpiece a large clock, pipes, 
pouches and boxes of tobacco and cigarettes, 
pipe holders, etc., are thrown in the greatest 
disorder. A large fire is burning in the 
grate. At the centre is a library table en- 
cumbered with papers, books, blueprints, 
letter -stands filled with letters, etc. At back a 
large glass door opens on a corridor. Along 
the corridor from R. people enter the room 
from the outside. The corridor to L. leads to 
the kitchenette and dining room of the apart- 
ment. Down stage at L. a door opens into 
the bedroom. In the remaining space a sofa 
and chairs are grouped. On a small table is 
a silver coffee service. The grand piano is 
littered with old magazines. 

At rise Gerald is walking up and down rest- 
lessly, smoking a pipe. Enters a handsome 

3 



Enter Madame 

blond woman exquisitely and conservatively 
gowned in morning costume. She has a 
comfortable corseted figure, a placid, shrewd 
face. She speaks slowly, soothingly, with a 
poise that is never shaken. She seems to 
carry her frank middle age like a decoration. 



FLORA 

Well, my dear boy, how is this for prompti 



GERALD 

{Takes her in his arms and kisses her 
fondly.) 
Flora dear, on time to the dot. By Jove I 
can't get used to it. You're a miracle; if you'd 
come floating in at the window or had shot 
up through the floor it would not seem more 
wonderful to me than to have a woman keep 
an appointment on time. 

FLORA 

You poor darling boy ! Such a life as you 
must have led. . . . 

{Noticing pipe.) 
4 



Act I 

Naughty, naughty, smoking like a chimney. 
What did Flora say only yesterday. . . . 

GERALD 

I know, dear, but I'm so nervous; it's a 
sedative you see. 

{She sits in chair and pours out his 
coffee, puts in milk and sugar, and 
hands it to him.) 
Won't you have some? 

FLORA 

Don't bother about me, thank you. I've 
had my breakfast. I always have it at 7.30. 
"Early to bed . . . early to rise . . ." 

GERALD 

And you'll meet no famous people. 

FLORA 

You're so clever, Gerald. You're always 
saying the wittiest things. I pride myself on 
having a sense of humour, and yet I can never 
think up things like that. 
5 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

Neither can I. Some more famous humour- 
ist said that. Some column conductor, I 
suppose. Seems to me every bright thing you 
hear at the club comes from one or the other 
of them. Do you ever read them, Flora? 

. FLORA 

I try to sometimes, but I never find any- 
thing very funny in them, and besides I don't 
seem to find time to read anything but the 
headlines. 

GERALD 

This is awfully good of you to put yourself 
out like this to give me breakfast. 

FLORA 

Why dear, it's no trouble at all. That's the 
advantage of living in the same building. 
All I have to do is take the elevator. 

GERALD 

It's a comfort to have you so near. 



Act I 

FLORA 

Don't you have anything but coffee for 
breakfast ? 

GERALD 

Can't eat. Coffee is a stimulant, you know. 
I'm in such a nervous state that every time 
I think of food, especially in the morning, 
every nerve in my stomach seems to stand on 
end. 

FLORA 

There, there, nothing to get worked up 
about. Flora is here now. You ought never 
to eat standing. That's what keeps you thin. 

GERALD 

That's right. Fine for the figure. 

FLORA 

Whenever your nerves try to get the better 
of you, take some deep breaths and say the 
multiplication table backwards. Some great 
man used to do that — Buddha or Christopher 

7 



Enter Madame 

Columbus or Henry James. Well, someone 
like that, dear. 

GERALD 

You make a lovely picture sitting there. 

"But well thou play est the housewife's part 
And all thy threads with magic art 
Have wound themselves about this heart." 

FLORA 

Oh, Gerald, did you make that up about 

me? 

GERALD 

No, but the poet who wrote that was a 
lucky devil. He was half starved all his life, 
but he had a wife who stuck to him and 
starved with him. 

FLORA 

To starve is a shiftless sort of a thing to do 

it seems to me and I never could bear artists 

of any kind. They don't seem decent to me 

somehow. So many of them are foreigners, 

8 



Act I 

but it isn't that, because I know some very- 
nice French people, and once I met a charm- 
ing Russian. But artists seem so immodest, 
so gauche, if you know what I mean. Every 
time you pick up a paper you read something 
about their divorces, their stolen jewels, or 
their twins. 

GERALD 

Twins ! Few of them stay married long 
enough for that. 

FLORA 

Oh, my dear, I hope I haven't said anything 
to hurt you. I almost forgot about Madame 
Delia Robbia. John's train must be late. 
You expected him before this, didn't you? 

GERALD 

Yes, the young upstart should be here by 
now. What's keeping him, anyway? 

FLORA 

I suppose John must be more like his 
mother than you. You know the artistic 
9 



Enter Madame 

temperament crops out, like drink, or in- 
sanity. I've noticed it before in John — never 
on time, and his taste in cravats ! 

GERALD 

Oh, well, he is young. Wait till he gets 
through college before we criticize him too 
severely. After all he's a manly, likable chap, 
though heaven knows we were never very 
congenial. Now, before he gets here there 
are some things I feel I must tell you. When 
I wrote Lisa to ask her to divorce me I told 
her that she wouldn't suffer financially, that 
if she let me go without a fuss I'd see she was 
well taken care of. There's the difficulty. 
That's one of the things we've got to face; 
Lisa is a most expensive person. 

FLORA 

But, my dear, she must make heaps of 
money. 

GERALD 

God knows what she does with it! She 
never has a cent put away. She calls on 
10 



Act I 

me to make up the deficit at least twice a 
year. 

FLORA 

You mean to tell me a prima donna as 
popular as she is doesn't even make enough 
to pay her bills. Then all these stories of 
artists' fabulous salaries you read in the papers 
are lies? 

GERALD 

No, some of the figures are real enough. 
Lisa is one of the best paid prima donnas in 
Europe, but she's generous, lavish, she has 
the taste of an oriental, she — well she's Lisa. 
What's the use of trying to explain her. Wait 
till you see her. I wonder, Flora, whether 
you have any conception of what my married 
life has been. To be bustled continuously 
about the world, to be for ever readjusting 
one's digestive apparatus to the atrocious 
cooking of a dozen different nations, to spend 
one's waking hours in the foyers of hotels and 
amid the maddening babel of the back-stage 
ii 



Enter Madame 

regions of opera houses, to use one's home 
only as a coaling station or dry-dock, and to 
be free not even then from the trillings and 
tootings and mi-mi-mi's of the prima donna 
and her musical entourage who hover about 
her and are at once atmosphere, press agents, 
and Greek chorus. In fact, to be the husband 
of the prima donna, to be referred to by a 
London paper as Mr. Gerald Delia Robbia 
and to be nominated by a New York news- 
paper wag as President of the Only Her 
Husband's Club. Such has been my life. 
Divorce has always seemed a detestable, 
crude thing to me, a sort of public acknow- 
ledgment of failure and defeat, and yet I 
know, Flora, that you with your womanly 
heart will see that the failure was not alto- 
gether my fault. Marriage is a game, but 
lord, it's not solitaire. 

FLORA 

Yes I know, Gerald dear. I am sure it 
wasn't your fault. 

12 



Act I 

GERALD 

But this is what I started to say when the 
memory of the past twenty years unlocked 
my tongue: As soon as we see Lisa and ar- 
range this thing harmoniously, I am going to 
fix a substantial marriage settlement on you 
so that you will be provided for no matter 
what happens. 

FLORA 

Oh, Gerald, how generous of you. 

GERALD 

Nonsense. And now if you don't mind 
you may give me a kiss. 

FLORA 

Dear silly boy — there. (Kisses him.) 
(john and aline enter unnoticed.) 

JOHN 

What again ! 

GERALD 

{Furiously.) 
Again, what do you mean by again! Why 
didn't Tamamoto show you in? 
13 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

I don't know, but he didn't. 

GERALD 

(Working himself up.) 
Well, why didn't he? That was my 
question. 

JOHN 

The same thing happened last Christmas 
when I came home. If I'd known it would 
happen again, I wouldn't have brought Aline. 

FLORA 

Gerald, explain to him immediately — the 
very idea. . . . 

GERALD 

(Thoroughly worked up.) 

You'd no business coming in like that — I 

told you last Christmas that you'd no business 

coming in like that — and here you go and do 

it again! How dare you, how dare you do 

14 



Act I 

the same thing again, how dare you disobey 
me. . . . 

FLORA 

(Furiously.) 

It isn't the same thing! Remember of 
whom you are speaking. There's never been 
a breath against my reputation. Oh what a 
dreadful situation! That's what comes of 
doing a kindness. 

(Starts to go.) 

GERALD 

No, Flora, no, stay where you are. 

FLORA 

Not another minute. . . . 

GERALD 

Wait Flora . . . Flora, this is Miss Aline 
Chalmers, . . . John, this is Mrs. Preston, 
who has done me the honour, . . . well . . . 
my future wife. 

JOHN 

Your what ? 

15 



Enter Madame 

FLORA 

Well I do hope it wasn't the same thing 
last Christmas. 

GERALD 

(Soothingly.) 

Not at all the same. Now please don't be 
unreasonable. 

FLORA 

And you mean to stand there and tell me 
that in this same room . . . 

GERALD 

(Quickly.) 
It wasn't at all the same. I had the table 
on the other side of the room. 

JOHN 

(Coming forward.) 
I say, what about mother! . . . 

GERALD 

I am coming to that. That's why I asked 
you to come home before the end of the term. 
16 



Act I 

I've got a lot to say to you. But look here, 
where are your manners. Why don't you ask 
Aline to sit down? 

ALINE 

{She has stopped near the door.) 
Oh, I am so sorry, I — please, I must be 
going. 

GERALD 

Perhaps it would be just as well. You see 
all this has an explanation that's as plain as 
the nose on my face — but you mustn't speak 
of it to your mother yet ; it's premature, she 
wouldn't understand — wait till I catch 
Tamamoto. 

JOHN 

{Bitterly.) 
I'm glad Aline came along. She might as 
well know what kind of a crazy family she's 
marrying into. 

GERALD 

Whom's she marrying? 
17 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

Me! 

GERALD 

You! Rot! Rot I tell you! Why you 
aren't old enough to earn cigarette money. 

JOHN 

{Looking meaningly at flora.) 
Look here sir, I'm old enough to under- 
stand that my fiancee ought not to be here — 
Come Aline. 

FLORA 

Wait, please. If you don't explain to those 
children at once I'll never look you in the face 
again. 

GERALD 

Sit down the pair of you. Aline might as 
well know now as later. John, your mother is 
coming home ! 

JOHN 

{Sarcastically — as they both sit on sofa.) 
Indeed ! 

18 



Act I 



GERALD 

Yes — as usual she won't write if she's 
within reach of a cable. Not even the news 
I had to give her about Mrs. Preston could 
shake a letter out of her. 

JOHN 

(Warmly in defence.) 
It's her warm heart. She loves to know 
that what she feels reaches you as soon 
as possible — warm from her fingers as it 
were. 

(Touched by his own eloquence.) 
Lord, Governor, how can you treat her so ! 

GERALD 

(Has pawed out the cables and is arrang- 
ing them chronologically as he talks. 
Stung by the reproach.) 
Yes, the warmth of her fingers has to reach 
me by cable. Mighty little warmth has 
reached me otherwise. You know nothing 
at all about it, you young romancer. 
19 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

Well, she has her profession, hasn't she? 
If you loved her you'd stay with her. 

GERALD 

Well, I have my profession, haven't I? 

JOHN 

{Sulkily.) 
Never saw you break your neck over it. 

GERALD 

{Furiously.) 
Much you know about it. I work like a 
dog. 

JOHN 

{Sulkily.) 
Just about. Never saw a dog work yet. 

GERALD 

Now look here, I won't tell you anything 
more if you are impertinent. 

20 



Act I 

FLORA 

Now wait Gerald. Of course we expected 
John to take his mother's part. 

GERALD 
(To JOHN.) 

Go along with her if that's all the advice 
you've got to give. Do you want me to be 
the husband of the prima donna, and to carry 
her poodle through all the capitals of Europe? 
I've done it enough! Never again! 

JOHN 

You should have thought of that before. 
This is an insult to mother, and puts her in a 
damnable position. 

GERALD 

There you go off at half cock. You don't 
know anything about it. How can you under- 
stand the feelings of a grown man. I want a 
home. I want my own fireside. I want to see 
my slippers toasting by the hearth when I 

21 



Enter Madame 

come in after a hard day's work. I want the 
ministering hands of a woman. 

JOHN 

Rot. You are tired of mother and you 
want a change — why don't you say so ? 

GERALD 

There you see Flora, what's the use ! 
{Gesticulates with the telegrams.) 

FLORA 

Never mind. You can't expect him to 
understand all at once. It's natural devotion 
to his mother. 

GERALD 

Nothing of the sort. He's scarcely seen 
her either, since he was a youngster and used 
to trail around Europe after her in search of a 
liberal education. 

JOHN 

She's my mother, and I'll see she gets a 
square deal. 

22 



Act I 

GERALD 

{Shouting.) 
Who wants to give her anything else? 

FLORA 

That's right — everything will come right 
if we'll just keep calm. Read the cables. 

GERALD 

{Calming himself.) 

Yes, here they are. All concise and away 
off the point. But I've gathered that Ma- 
dame intends to come home. The first is 
from Madrid: 

''Oh, my Gerald, these golden autumn days 
mock the misery in my eyes. Lisa." 

JOHN 

She's broken-hearted. I won't stand for it- 
Do you hear? 

GERALD 

Hear them all, and then judge : 
"Spain, land passionate and ascetic. The 
23 



Enter Madame 

night long I danced until the Duke of Alva 
stole my slipper. Lisa." 

FLORA 

Dear, dear, what a liberty to take ! 

JOHN 

(In arms.) 
Well, she couldn't help that, could she? 

FLORA 

Perhaps not. But she needn't boast about 
it. 

GERALD 

The next came from Barcelona: 
"I fled the opera quite at once in the middle 
of Salve Dimora. The turmoil of my flight 
rumbled behind me in the silent streets. A 
mob like angry bees sought me in vain. I 
found peace on a tall ship that rocked. 
Lisa." 

FLORA 

Mercy what a long cablegram. Is it in 
cipher? 

24 



Act I 

GERALD 

Oh, no. Lisa, you must remember, is a 
foreigner. 

FLORA 

Yes, yes, of course, dear. 

JOHN 

And a very nice thing to be. Mrs. Preston, 
you talk as though it were some disease. 
She's the most wonderful woman in the world. 
I can read right through to what she was 
thinking and suffering when she sent those 
cables. 

GERALD 

I don't believe your mother's got a heart 
when the music stops. 

FLORA 

It's a dreadful waste of money. 

ALINE 

I think she's a darling. How did those 
foreign officials get those cables right? 
25 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

She probably stood over them with a 
stiletto. Lisa isn't one to have her effects 
spoiled. 

ALINE 

It's very beautiful and poetic, but what 
does it all mean. 

GERALD 

Trouble undoubtedly. All Madame' s most 
strenuous arguments are conducted in verse 
libre. 

JOHN 

After all, why should she care? She's 
probably jolly glad to get rid of you, if the 
truth were known. • 

GERALD 

Look here ! If you expect to talk like that 

to me, get out of my house. Good Lord, here 

I am trying to be frank and calm and sensible, 

trying to talk to you as if you were a man and 

26 



Act I 

an equal, to see if we can come to some amic- 
able solution of the problem. . . . 

FLORA 

Now patience, patience, dear. John . . . 
may I call you that? It seems absurd not to, 
under the circumstances. 

GERALD 

Call him anything you like. That's much 
too good for him. 

FLORA 

Of course, John, you are beautifully loyal 
to your mother. We expect nothing else of 
you. But won't you consider just a moment 
what an unsatisfactory life your father has 
led? 

JOHN 

He always seemed to me to be jolly well off. 

FLORA 

That's only his dear courageous way— why 
he's been a wanderer on the face of the earth; 
he's had no home; he's been so lonely. 
27 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

I've never noticed him alone, not long 
enough to make a very deep impression on me. 

GERALD 

Now that will do. Never mind Flora — 
don't listen to him. This last telegram came 
some days ago. I gather that if Madame 
stowed away on that rocking ship it was 
probably heading for America. So she ought 
to arrive very soon. 

{Fishes out the morning paper.) 
I phoned last night to the lines that stop 
at Barcelona or start from there, but her 
name is not on their passenger lists. She may 
have travelled incognito. She'd love that. 
She's probably posing as an escaped queen. 
She won't miss a chance, that's sure. Come in. 

(tamamoto comes in after a discreet 
knock with a telegram on a tray.) 
Oh, halloo there. Another cablegram. 

{Exit TAMAMOTO.) 

{Tears it open.) 
28 



Act I 

"Arriving. Steamer Mongolia. In my 
heart is peace and blessings for all. My arms 
are filled with roses. Lisa." 
(Tears it up.) 

JOHN 

(Rising.) 

Great! 

ALINE 

Is the ship in? 

FLORA 

What a pleasant message. I knew she 
would understand. 

(gerald has been looking through 
paper.) 

GERALD 

(Reading the ship's name.) 
Mongolia — Lord bless us. It's in ! 
(There's a silence.) 

JOHN 

Do you think she'll come here to stay? 
With us? 

29 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

The place was big enough five years ago. 
Unless her retinue has grown in the meantime. 

JOHN 

Do you think she is bringing the whole 
cavalcade along? 

GERALD 

She left in such a hurry she may have over- 
looked 'em. From past experience we'd 
better keep away from the boat. Six feet of 
you, John, would be a blow to the Delia 
Robbia pose of perennial youth. 

ALINE 

Surely she'll be crazy to see John. 

JOHN 

(At the window.) 
Don't bother about me, Aline. Mother 
and I understand each other. We don't have 
to show off. 

30 



Act I 

GERALD 

{Calling into next room.) 
Tamamoto. . . . Isn't it like her to drop 
on us like this. 

(tamamoto enters.) 
Here, Tamamoto, pack up my things and send 
them over to the club. And order some 
flowers. 

JOHN 

{Excitedly.) 
I'd go for flowers myself only I am afraid 
to miss her. 

FLORA 

I'll run along and drop in when you've all 
met . . . just offhand you know. Oh, my 
dear, I wish I could help you see it through. 



GERALD 

I'll take you to the elevator. 
{Exit.) 

3i 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

Disgusting! Never mind, Aline. I know 
you'll love mother. She's wonderful ! 

ALINE 

She must be John — because she is your 
mother. 

JOHN 

Do you know sometimes I wonder how I 
can love you both so much. You are so 
different. 

ALINE 

Perhaps that's why. With such a famous 
mother I don't see how you can be interested 
in me. I'll never be famous. Will that 
matter? 

JOHN 

Why no. Don't ever change. Always be 
just you. 

ALINE 

My poor little engagement! I thought it 
was such big news last night. No one said a 
32 



Act I 

word about it except to mention the fact that 
it's all rot ! 

JOHN 

(Coming to her.) 
Mother won't make fun of it. You wait. 
I don't know what to do. I don't dare go 
down for fear of disgracing her with my long 
legs ... I hope mother won't mind too 
much that I'm a man. 

(Enter gerald. Much noise is heard 
behind him.) 

GERALD 

Alarums without. I've got stage fright. 
(A tremendous noise is heard outside of 
Italian, French, Russian, Japanese, 
American. Enter first bice. She's 
short, fat, birdlike in face and move- 
ment. She is dressed fantastically, in 
a manner to compel attention. Her 
voice is shrill and hard with sudden 
flashes of tenderness. She is a mix- 
33 



Enter Madame 

ture of undying devotion, utter ras- 
cality, meanness, and generosity.) 

Well, Bice, still alive. How are you? 

BTCE 

Signor Geraldo. Madonna benedetta. How 
beautiful, how young you look. 

(He tries to help her with her shawl.) 
No thank you. I can do that myself. Ah! 
Tamamoto ! guar da fammi il piacere aiutami. 

TAMAMOTO 

(Very cross.) 
No understand. . . . 

GERALD 

Tamamoto, you are to do what Bice says. 

BICE 

(Loading him with her hat and cloak.) 
Bring here immediate portmanteaux Nos. 
"15" and "22" and open them on the floor. 
Go! Quick! 

(Sees JOHN.) 
Giovannino, il Signor Giovannino. 
34 



Act I 

JOHN 

(Embracing her.) 
Dear old thing, it's good to see you. 
Where's mother? 

(tamamoto goes into bedroom with his 
burden.) 

BICE 

Right away your mother she come. My 
how tall he is ! He was like that. 
(Indicates height.) 

JOHN 

This is Miss Chalmers, Bice. 

BICE 

River ita Signorina. 

(Curtsying. Then to JOHN, wagging a 
knowing finger .) 
Ah! the little bride already — eh? 

ALINE 

How do you do, Bice ! Can John and I 
help you? 

35 



Enter Madame 

(While bice is talking tamamoto has 
come from the inner room staggering 
under valises and has opened them on 
the floor, bice, as soon as this is done, 
flurries about him like a hen — her 
flouncy wide skirts fluttering like 
wings.) 

BICE 

Yes indeed, Madame she likes to have her 
home wherever she go — she's all for cosy, all 
for home, you remember that Signor Geraldo? 

(gerald grins from ear to ear.) 
Put these ornaments on the mantelpiece — 
here are sofa pillows, scarves; the picture 
frames belong on the table. Madame likes 
to have her friends about her. Have you 
flowers? Good, put them in these vases. 
Tamamoto, get a basket and clear away all 
the papers from that table; go, go quick! 

(gerald rushes to rescue some files of 
letters.) 

(As the ornaments are being put in their 
36 



Act I 

places tamamoto returns with a large 

basket.) 
Aline, put these candles in Madame's room. 
She hate sudden light. She want all soft. 

GERALD 

We're not getting young are we, Bice? 

BICE 

Ah, Monsieur will have the shock of his 
life. Madame look seventeen. 

(bice takes the basket that tamamoto 
presents to her and holding it under 
the mantelshelf she sweeps into it all 
the tobacco jars, cigarette boxes, and 
odds and ends.) 
There you go! 

GERALD 

{Helplessly.) 
Yes, there you go. 

(tamamoto exits with them.) (bice 
sees gerald in arm-chair.) 
37 



Enter Madame 

BICE 

Ah, beg pardon, but this is Madame's 
corner. 

(gerald disgustedly crosses to sofa.) 

BICE 

She brings her home wherever she go. You 
remember that. 

GERALD 

Yes! Don't I! 

BICE 

(Looking about room.) 
Oh, what a change already. 

(tamamoto enters with a large wreath, 
white dove in centre.) 

GERALD 

Holy Moses, who's responsible for that? 

BICE 

Ah ! Signor Giovanni, who done that ! My 
God, who has done that to my madame ! She 
will yell without a doubt ! 
38 



Act I 

GERALD 

(Who has read the card.) 
Ahem ! A friend sent it, Bice. 

BICE 

Santi Bendetti ! 

GERALD 

That stays, Bice. Put it here, Tamamoto ! 

BICE 

Ah ! but it is wonderful ! Although Signore, 
if you permit — The little dead bird up there. 
In Italy we say he bring bad luck. 

GERALD 

In America we have no bad luck ! 

BICE 

(Shrugging her shoulders.) 
Eh\ fortunati loro, so much the better! 

(The room has now been transformed 
into an ornate, bizarre, and comfort- 
able apartment. The last traces of 
poor Gerald's reign have entirely 
39 



Enter Madame 

disappeared. Enter chef from back 

With TAMAMOTO.) 

{The cook's voice has never ceased for a 
moment, and though tamamoto does 
not make a sound, the immobility of 
his face would strike terror to the 
heart of any cook less determined. As 
it is the chef is frightened.) 

CHEF (ARCHIMEDE.) 

Vieni qui Bice per Vamor di Dio. Ah! 
Signor Geraldo, servitor e suo. 

GERALD 

Archimede, you old sinner, what's the 
matter ? 

ARCHIMEDE 

It is just you I must see — I am cook — 
My duty I must perform. Without me 
Madame she die. Of course she cannot eat 
the mess of the foreign gentleman there. He 
very handsome. Oh yes I do not say. He 
make fine piece of statuary if he sit cross leg — 
40 



Act I 

but cook that is me. I am cook from head to 
foot. He say "I cook." I say, "I cook." 
He say, "My gentleman must eat me." I 
say, ' ' Madame never eat nothing that is not 
me." And yet the machine in there js like 
that. 

{Makes two little circles with the thumb 
and first finger of each hand.) 
How can we cook together ! 

TAMAMOTO 

{Intensely.) 
I am cook this place. No one go my 
kitchen. 

GERALD 

Ah ! Now we'll see some fun. 

ARCHIMEDE 

{Persuasively, almost in tears.) 
But Madame. She cannot eat you. She 
want me, me. Saints in Heaven, do I cook 
in my hat ? 

4i 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

Tamamoto, during the stay of Madame 
Delia Robbia her chef will do the cooking. 

TAMAMOTO 

I do not like noise. I do not like. Old man 
make slop — fat woman make confuse — 
parrot, dog, cat, orders pass around my head 
like a strong hail. No can do — go. 
(tamamoto bows and exits.) 

GERALD 

(Aghast.) 
God bless our happy home ! 

ARCHIMEDE 

(Blithely.) 
Grazie, Signor Geraldo. I go, I go. I cook 
such dinners, you lick your fingers. 
(Exit.) 

BICE 

(Excitedly.) 
The screen ! Madonna we forget the screen. 
Archimede, il paravento! 

(archimede runs to the door.) 
42 



Act I 

Is it in the kitchen ! If we have left it on 
the sheep! We are all lost. Madame die of 
pneumonia, of the consumption from draft. 
{Enter doctor dragging screen. It is a 
magnificent Chinese affair.) 
Ah! Grazie al cielo. Grazie dottore. 
{Enter miss smith.) 
(john helps bice place the screen behind 
Madame' s chair.) 

GERALD 

Hello Doctor. How do you do Miss Smith. 
It's a blessing you found the screen. I'd have 
been a raving maniac. 

{At R.of doctor.) 

MISS SMITH 

They put it with my baggage! So absurd 



{Thumping her chest.) 
Do I look as though I needed a screen? 

GERALD 

No indeed ! This is John. You remember 
John. 

43 



Enter Madame 

doctor and miss smith 

Oh Madonna! ) frfy A . s 
xj >±u .\ (Together) 

Hasn t he grown !J 

DOCTOR 

I rejoice to see you both so well and beauti- 
ful. Madame she come now. We have a 
little trouble at the custom. I must hasten 
to prepare the nerve tonic. Scusatemi. 
(Exits.) 

MISS SMITH 

You will excuse me. I always take a cold 
bath before my work begins. Excuse me! 
Excuse me! 

(Exits.) 

BICE 

(She's gone out during talk and returns. 
In a hushed excited voice.) 
Enter Madame. 

( Yelling to cook.) 
Archimede, the broth, Madame come — 
quick, quick. 
(Exits.) 

44 



Act I 

(Gerald stands with his back to the 
mantel, john is up stage eagerly 
awaiting his mother, aline stands 
near him holding his hand. Enter 
lisa della robbia. She imme- 
diately catches sight of john. For a 
moment she cannot move, she trembles 
with emotion , then wordlessly she 
flies into his arms. A long embrace, 
then leaning from him she gazes into 
his face.) 

LISA 

Johnnie! My little Johnnie has become 
a man! Ah, how the great earth must 
sigh as the generations rush by like a 
mighty wind and drop, as the wind drops, 
at sunset ! 

JOHN 

{Enthusiastically. ) 
Gee! it's great to have you come mother. 
You always knock us off our feet. You look 
45 



Enter Madame 

ripping ! ripping ! Doesn't she Aline? This is 
Aline mother. 

{Bashfully.) 
Aline Chalmers, you know. 

(lisa quite lost among her poetic similes 
blinks a little as the torrent of boyish 
enthusiasm pours about her.) 

LISA 

Aline! Aline Chalmers? 

JOHN 

You know mother, Aline 



LISA 

(Remembering.) 
Oh — oh yes ! 

(Embraces her. Then looking at her.) 
What a dark child. Why more like my 
child than you. Oh, no. 

(To aline, pointing to his hair.) 
You see, he get that — from his Venetian 
ancestors. 

(Putting them side by side.) 
46 



Act I 

One, two! Just as one group flowers. Oh 
such a beautiful two ! Child speak, I want to 
hear the timbre of your voice. 

ALINE 

I don't know what to say. . . . 

LISA 

Ver' light Soprano, perhaps it will grow. 
Now say : I love you. 

JOHN 

{Shocked.) 
She's shy mother. 

LISA 

Why not ! go on ! 

ALINE 

(Is very shy, then slowly she turns her 
face up to John and says in a sweet 
trembling voice as if gathering courage 
from his look.) 
I love you ! 

47 



Enter Madame 



LISA 



Ah, the darlings, the darlings ! 

(JOHN points to GERALD.) 

(lisa sees him for the first time and 
rushes to him, followed by john 
who glares at his father. She holds 
out her hand. He takes it and 
kisses it.) 

GERALD 

Lisa, it's always The Great Day when 
you come. 

LISA 

Is it my Gerald. Then I must rejoice that 
I have come so far ! 

(She lays one hand on her husband's 

shoulder and the other on John's as 

they stand on either side of her and 

says softly:) 

Two such big men and one little woman. 

Why did I stay away so long? My Gerald's 

48 



Act I 



hair grows grey and our boy has become a 



man 



GERALD 
(Down L.) 
Don't take his six feet to heart, my dear. 
I couldn't very well keep him in short trousers 
till you came, but I'm quite young enough 
to do for both. 

LISA 

Life has rushed by me like a swift wind, 
and the sound of my voice singing silly little 
tunes has deafened me to the rush of its 
passing. 

(john and aline are deeply impressed 
but Gerald looks at her with a whimsi- 
cal smile, lisa is hurt by it.) 
Ah, of course, I forgot. This is America. 
Here when the heart speaks, the lips say 
"Fine weather we are having." Ough! 
Where are my servants? Where is Bice! 
Bice! 

(bice enters.) 
4 49 



Enter Madame 

BICE 

Si Signora — un momento. 

(lisa hands bice her hat and offers her 
shoulders to have her wraps removed.) 

LISA 

{Furiously.) 
Ma come, ' ' Un momento! ' ' Sono ore che mi 
lasci li colla roba addosso — ore! 

{Turns and sees gerald in her arm 
chair.) 
E lasci che la gente si sieda nella mia sedia! 
(bice, sees gerald in the arm-chair. 
Motions for him to leave, which he 
does disgustedly.) 
{Sits in her arm-chair triumphantly and 
motions to aline to kneel near her.) 
Dear child, tell me your name once more. 

ALINE 

Aline . . . 

LISA 

Aline! In Italian "Ali" means wings. 
You look like that, child a bird with swift 
50 



Act I 

white wings. Now fly off with my John 
while I rest. Fly off but not too far; just 
where I can hear the twitter of your voice and 
glimpse the flutter of your wings — the little 
dove. Au revoir my darlings. 

(doctor enters, lisa sees him and 
immediately sinks back into the chair 
moaning gently. Exit children.) 

GERALD 

(Starts up to go to her, but sees the doctor 
and lays back on sofa.) 

DOCTOR 

(Down to L.) 
Ah Signora mia che imprudenza! Always 
she eats herself up. She must drink this at 
once. 

(At the doctor s command lisa tastes the 
medicine, finding it bitter she makes a 
face and waves it away.) 
I command. And then completely she rest 
. . . two . . . three hours. 
5i 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

(Weakly.) 
Oh dottore! Life demands that I be strong. 

DOCTOR 

With rest will come strength. 

GERALD 

The doctor is right. Of course you must 
be tired. I'll go now. 

LISA 

(Coming to life at once.) 
No! no! I will not sleep — vada via dottore 
— la prego — There is much I have to do 
— later I rest — Now I must speak with my 
husband. 

GERALD 

(Rising.) 
My dear, there's plenty of time. 

LISA 

No! novo! 

(To the doctor, motioning him away 
with a smile.) 
52 



Act I 

Vada! 

(The doctor stands his ground stub- 
bornly presenting his medicine.) 
(Sweetly, as if conferring a favour on a 
child.) 
All right ! I take the medicine. 

(Seeing the doctor still determined to 
insist on her swallowing the stuff in his 
presence.) 
I'll take it— I promise most faithfully! 

(doctor goes shrugging his shoulders. 
Exits, lisa in looking for a vase or 
something into which to pour the 
doctor's medicine comes across Mrs. 
Preston s bouquet.) 
Madonna mia, Gerald, did you bring that 
thing for my grave? 

GERALD 

No Lisa, Mrs. Preston of whom I wrote 
you . . . she . . . 

LISA 

Ah! I see. She sends a peace offering. 
53 



Enter Madame 

. . 5 The little dove — She is subtle this 
lady! 

GERALD 

My dear girl, you will twist things your 
own way. She just wished to be kind, to 
welcome you, that sort of thing. 

LISA 

Ah ! that sort of thing. Gerald, it's wonder- 
ful. It is as if she stood in the room. 

(Shivers.) 
So that's who she is. 

GERALD 

Nothing of the sort — She was in a hurry. 
She probably bought the first thing she saw. 
To me it looks like a naive, but warm and 
sincere impulse. 

LISA 

Mine was an impulse, warm and sincere. Did 
I do well to come? Are you glad to see me? 

GERALD 

To see you has always been my delight. 
54 



Act I 

The trouble is I haven't had enough of it to 
keep me from starving. 

LISA 

And from now on you wish to die of starva- 
tion? 

GERALD 

Oh no! That's not my intention. Just to 
try some other kind of nourishment. 

LISA 

{Nodding toward flowers.) 
Ah! it will not agree with you, it's rather 
heavy fare. 

{Thoughtfully.) 
That's what puzzles me. So she looks like 
that ! Until now your amourettes were more 
like a series of hors d'ceuvres. 

GERALD 

Lisa, this lady, well — it's a difficult thing 

to explain in a letter. You see my life with 

you has been colourful, but snatchy. It has 

been more like the experience of a playgoer. 

55 



Enter Madame 

At intervals the curtain came down and I 
left the theatre of your presence always re- 
gretfully, always eager to come again, and 
with the sense that it wasn't real and couldn't 
be expected to be real — that was the fun of it 
and the charm of it — but it's an awful pace to 
keep up. Frankly I don't see how you do it! 

LISA 

Ah, and now you no longer care to go to the 
play, it is October in your life, — the landscape 
glows, the sun is still warm, but the evenings 
are chilly and you like to sit by the fire en 
famille, in your slippers. . . . 
(Points to them.) 

GERALD 

Lord, I haven't had time to change. . . . 

LISA 

And the lady of the dove will sit opposite 
in that big fat chair, which she will completely 
fill . . . and she will . . . 

(Rises.) 
My God! 

56 




Gerald: "You see, my life with you has been colorful, but snatchy.' 



Act I 

GERALD 

Now, that doesn't appeal to you, does it? 

LISA 

(With fervour.) 
Oh no!!! 

GERALD 

Well, there you are, you see . . . 

LISA 

(Change of mood. Apparently making 
the best of it.) 
All right, all right. I am a woman of the 
world. I understand. It was nice to talk it 
over quietly together. Mon ami, — bon ami — 
la! Shake hands a Vanglaise — en bon 
camarade! 

(Offers hand.) 
(They shake hands.) 

GERALD 

My dear Lisa, I am no more blind today 
than I ever was. To me you are the most 
fascinating woman in the world. 
57 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Oh, thank you. That makes it easier for 
me to tell you my little story . . . the real 
reason for my coming. . . . 

GERALD 

What now? 

LISA 

Your letter arrived at a most opportune 
moment. I also have met someone, not too 
young, not too old, not as old as you, not as 
young as me. Just right you know. He is a 
great poet, no money he have, no jewels to 
bring to me . . . just his heart and his poems 
he lay at my feet . . . when you write me of 
the American Lady I say ... all is well — 
soon I too can marry. 

GERALD 

(is dumbfounded for a moment, then he 
breaks into a roar of laughter. Up 
and down C.) 
58 



Act I 

A poet, a spring poet. Oh, Lisa, come off. 
I don't believe a word of it. 

LISA 

Oh, you do not believe eh ? You then are 
the only one who has yearnings! You are 
tired of romance, you sigh for quiet, for peace, 
for old slippers! What have I to do with 
these things? For years you leave me all 
alone. 

GERALD 

I leave you alone ? 

LISA 

I am Lisa Delia Robbia who is always 
young. I starve for romance, for poetry. 
Now I find it and I take it ; you can have the 
old slippers. 

GERALD 

Don't be a fool, Lisa. If there's anything 
in this you must be mad. Some fool versify- 
ing boy. Where will you get the money to 
support him? Do you expect me to do it? 
59 



Enter Madame 

First there is your villa at Viareggio; — then 
the castle in Andalusia that you bought to 
make our dreams come true; there's your 
entourage : Bice, the old ruffianness, the secre- 
tary, the doctor, the blooming cook, the dogs, 
the jewels, these marvellous exits and en- 
trances, these scenic effects. Bah! You 
have the extravagances of an empress. In 
spite of all the money you make, the burden 
has been a pretty heavy one for me. God 
knows I haven't grumbled. I've realized that 
you must have your trappings. But now by 
God this must all change. I've no intention 
of maintaining a pet poet. 

LISA 

I, Lisa Delia Robbia, am to be thrown aside 
like an old shoe, to live alone, to wither like an 
autumn leaf, to die alone. That is my fate 
which you plan for me. No, I tell you, no. 
Bah for your money, for your common ideas, 
your flatfooted slippers — Bah, I say. 
(Crosses to front of sofa.) 
60 



Act I 

GERALD 

All of a sudden this passion for romance, 
this melodrama of dying alone. For years 
I've begged you to come back to me or to let 
me be with you and what did you answer 
me. You must be free. You must be alone! 
I've been nothing to you, nothing mattered, 
nothing but your own headstrong way. 

LISA 

I am Delia Robbia. Love is my master 
and my slave. I am young as eternity, old 
as the moons, wise as the stars. 

GERALD 

Oh stop, Lisa! Stop acting! 

(Grabs her arm and jerks her back on 
to sofa. 

Now you listen to me. You're a conceited 
middle-aged woman, whose career is on the 
wane. You never were a beauty at any time 
in your life. You've been spoiled and petted ; 
self has been your God and you've served 
61 



Enter Madame 

him well. You've done what you pleased 
and never counted the cost. Oh, you've had 
your fill of fame and glory, and what was our 
part — John's and mine — in your game? Even 
now we couldn't meet you at the boat. We 
mustn't be seen. We might spoil the scenery. 
You know how we yielded to your whims and 
even now, God help me — I can't stand quietly 
by and see you make a fool of yourself. A 
poet — bah! Look, I'll show you something. 

{Holds the mirror to her face.) 

(She draws back.) 
You are growing old, Lisa! There's too 
much rouge here. Too much make-up, too 
much trouble to gain your effects. How dare 
you speak of poets, of romance. You're 
growing old, Lisa, old I tell you, old ! 

(Throws mirror on table. Stands watch- 
ing her.) 

LISA 

(Slowly rises, her j ace bathed with tears.) 
Am I so very old Gerald, too old for you to 
love, too old to love you? 
62 



Act I 

GERALD 

{Impulsively runs to her and takes her 
into his arms.) 
Lisa! Oh, it's good to love you, and it's 
not half bad to kiss you either. I dare say 
that's all you want. I tell you Lisa it isn't 
that I'm not grateful to you. Why you've 
been the most exquisite, magnificent, the most 
ideal mistress a man ever had. 

LISA 

Gerald. . . . 

{Pushing him away.) 

GERALD 

What else would you call it? Have you 
the faintest idea of what it means to be a wife? 

LISA 

Gerald. 

GERALD 

You've lived with me, but have you ever 
been a wife to me? Why, my dear girl, have 
you ever stopped to think that if I hadn't 
63 



Enter Madame 

been the impetuous, well brought up young 
fool that I was, I need never have married you. 
It wouldn't have made the least difference. 

LISA 

Gerald ! This is too much. . . . 
(Crosses to L.) 

GERALD 

Just a few hurried words before a justice 
of the peace. And the joke of it. . . . The 
first thing you did was to lose your marriage 
certificate, the next thing was to lose your 
ring ! The other day I looked for my marriage 
lines and I'll be hanged if / know where they 
are. ... In order to prove we are married 
at all I'll have to hunt up the files of the Ar- 
chives in Milan. And look at our life — God 
the whole thing is the damnedest joke there is. 

LISA 

(Angerly.) 
Gerald, I'll never forgive you the longest 
day I live. Very well, then divorce, divorce, 
64 



Act I 

you shall have it. Oh, I wish I had it here 
now that I might throw it in your sneering 
face. 

{Enter tamamoto.) 

TAMAMOTO 

Mrs. Preston calling. . . . 

LISA 

{Hysterically.) 
No, no, no, go away, I won't see her! I 
will not see her. 

{Exit TAMAMOTO.) 
{To GERALD.) 

Go, go, go, I don't want to set eyes upon 
your face again. 

GERALD 

{Exits.) 

(lisa, left alone stands for a moment as 
if turned to stone. Then a tremen- 
dous paroxysm of rage shakes her from 
head to foot. She is very still, very 
silent, wave upon wave of fury passes 
5 65 



Enter Madame 

down her rigid body; she twists a help- 
less pillow in her hands; twice a scream 
seems about to break from her throat 
but each time it is painfully choked 
back — finally catching sight of flora's 
unhappy bouquet, with one sweep of 
a stiff arm she drags it to the floor. 
At the noise of its falling the doors 
open, and her servants all rush to her. 
The chef with a cup of broth; bice 
with a fan, while the doctor carries 
her to the arm-chair. They all gather 
about her.) 
(john enters.) 

JOHN 

Mother dear, mother. 

LISA 

{Shrieking hysterically.) 
John, John, he has broken my heart. I 
only wanted to be loved. What have I done 
to deserve all this ! 

66 



Act I 

JOHN 

I am here mother, I'll protect you. I'll 
give my life to you. 

LISA 

(Absentmindedly patting him.) 
Thank you Johnnie dear, thank you. 
(Then weakly.) 
I must rest — Oh, what a face I must have ! 

JOHN 

You do look tired ! 

LISA 

Do I look old? — Oh, Madonna! Do I look 
very old ! Bice — send for someone — a facial 
massage, a hot bath, a masseuse, presto per 

Vamor di Dio 

(Exit bice at R.) 

JOHN 

Doctor, can't you give her something to 
make her sleep ? 

67 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Johnnie dear. . . . 

(Raises herself half to her feet.) 
This is check? but not yet checkmate! — this is 
war but not defeat ! . . . 

(Enter bice with a beautiful tea gown.) 

BICE 

See Madame what I get for you! Isn't it 
beautiful ? 

LISA 

(Looking at the tea gown.) 
(Suddenly forgets her troubles, she 
smiles up at bice, her breath still 
catches in her throat as the hysteria 
subsides slowly.) 
Ma guarda quanto e carino! tutte quei ghiri 
gori sono interessanti! ma Sai ci vorrebbe 
qualche cosa con un po piu di brio un po piu 
di slancio! 

CURTAIN 



68 



ACT II 

The time that elapses is the time it takes to get 
the first decree of divorce. It is early after- 
noon and Madame is taking her nap. The 
little parlour is bathed in the soft glow of the 
sun and of a large fire that is burning in the 
grate. 

BICE, MISS SMITH, the DOCTOR, and ARCHIMEDE 

are standing together in a hushed group, 
thoughtfully, sorrowfully, like people who 
have just received a blow, bice is crying. 

BICE 

Ah, my Signora, my gay little Signora — it 
will kill her. 

MISS SMITH 

(Deprecatingly.) 
Oh I don't think it will kill her. 
69 



Enter Madame 

THE DOCTOR 

Spirits of ammonia and perhaps I will 
even go so far as a mild injection of mor- 
phine, ver' mild, ver' mild; with Madame 
one must be careful, the reactions are too 
violent. 

ARCHIMEDE 

I will cook her risotto that will be better. 
I have know her to eat it with gusto when 
she was in such sorrow that the tears run 
down her face into the plate. 

BICE 

Oh, you all — you don't know her as I know. 
These last two weeks I sleep in there. Every 
night she go to sleep on my breast like a child. 
"Bice," she say, " perhaps he come back to- 
morrow" every night she say, " perhaps he 
come back tomorrow" and I say, "but 
Madame refuse to see him when he come." 
"Perhaps he come anyway," she say, "per- 
haps he break in the door and cry: 'my Lisa! 
70 



Act II 

the sun is gone out of my Heaven, since Lisa 
is gone out of my life!' " 

MISS SMITH 

Mr. Gerald is an Irishman, isn't he? 

BICE 

Yes. 

MISS SMITH 

Well, then perhaps he might behave that 
way. 

DOCTOR 

Mr. Fitzgerald has come again and again. 
I open the door to him myself once; he say: 
"I want to apologize to her, doctor, try to 
persuade her to see me," but she would not. 

BICE 

{Goes to door of bedroom and listens.) 
She wanted him to break in the door. Now 
it's too late. 

MISS SMITH 

The best thing is work — she must plunge 
right into work. Weissman wants her for a 
7i 



Enter Madame 

concert tour, it's an amazing amount of 
money. He's been pestering the life out of us. 
She might as well take it. We must urge her 
to take it. 

{Enter JOHN.) 

JOHN 

{To miss smith) down C. rises goes up 

c.) 

Where is she? I came as soon as I got your 
message. Does she know already? 

BICE 

She's still asleep. We thought it would be 
better if you broke the news to her. 

JOHN 

Is that the lawyer's letter? 

miss smith 
{Hands him the letter.) 
It's the announcement of the court grant- 
ing the decree of divorce. 

72 



Act II 

JOHN 

We'll have to take mother back to Europe 
now. I'll go along of course. I suppose 
father will want to marry right away, and 
mother mustn't be here. 

BICE 

Oh, no! Nothing of the kind, the old 
libertine will have to wait. I beg your pardon 
of course, but he is a pig and a libertine that 
breaks my Signora's heart. 

JOHN 

Why would he have to wait? 

BICE 

It is the law. 

MISS SMITH 

The decree will not be absolute, except 
after the lapse of three months. 

JOHN 

Why then they are not divorced. 
73 



Enter Madame 



BICE 



Oh, yes. 



MISS SMITH (AH 

It's a formality. Together) 

DOCTOR 

They are divorced. 

MISS SMITH 

It's just that they can't remarry before the 
three months are over. 

{From the inner room comes a cascade 
of coloratura, trills, runs ending with: 
"Bice, Bice, Bice!" 

il Vieni sul, mio core amor el" The 
door is thrown open and lisa enters 
in high good humour fresh from a 
good sleep. She wears an entranc- 
ing negligee, and her hair is loosely 
knotted. She stands smiling brightly 
on the assembled crowd of worried 
people.) 

74 



Act II 

LISA 

{Brightly.) 
Guar da quanta gente! Cosa, c'e. Oh 
Johnnie all dressed up, where are you going? 
Johnnie, don't look like that no matter what 
has happened you must not look like that. 
Never! Miss Smith — out, out! you know I 
cannot bear to wait, I never wait ! What is, 
What is, what is ! Quick ! 

MISS SMITH 

(Quickly handing paper.) 
The first decree of divorce. 

(lisa takes the paper, she looks at it, she 
looks at it a long time. The crew oj de- 
pendents stiffen and get ready, the doc- 
tor edges quietly towards the glass of 
spirits of ammonia and takes it into his 
hand; bice gets into position to catch 
her if she drops, they all look tense.) 

LISA 

(Wistfully.) 
He did not break in the door! 
75 



Enter Madame 

{Then with sudden tenderness.) 
My dears, my friends, all worried about 
me; how lucky I am to be so blessed. Bice, 
Vecchia arnica! qua dammi un bacio. 

(Kisses her.) 
Dio ti benedica, vecchia buort arnica — cari 
tutti y thank you. There, that's enough, we 
need calm, strength, thought. It is not all 
over, oh no ! Please go — open a bottle of wine, 
Archimede, all drink my health." Da bravi 
— via coraggio! I will be alone with my son. 

(They all exit quietly, rather dazed with 
a jew broken murmurs; the only 
things they can think of.) 

(lisa left alone with her boy returns to 
her sad mood.) 
He did not break in the door. 

(Sits on the sofa.) 

JOHN 

(Sitting on arm of sofa.) 
You are an amazing woman, mother, you 
never do what's expected of you. 
76 



Act II 

LISA 

No one does what is expected of them, it is 
such a puzzle. They say there are great pitch 
black spaces between the stars, I think they 
are between the people too, oh quite pitch. 

JOHN 

Pitch black, darling. 

LISA 

(Absently.) 
Yes, pitch, very pitch. Now you are my 
son, and yet you do not understand me, nor I 
you. You stand up there, and there's blood 
of mine running very busy in and out of all 
the little veins ; there should be thoughts like 
me darting about the brain I gave to you — 
why are there not ? 

JOHN 

I grew up away from you, I confess, it's 
hard for me to understand you. 

LISA 

Yet you love me ? 

77 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

Yes, mother, very much. 

LISA 

You love Aline? 

JOHN 

Yes, mother, very much. 

LISA 

You say the two just alike, there is not one 
speck of difference in the tone. You don't 
feel just alike? 

JOHN 

You can't go about feeling and shouting 
about it, you know. It isn't done. 

LISA 

(With a flash of understanding.) 
Ah! 

(Then thoughtfully.) 
What would you do if Aline should say to 
you: Go away, go away, I don't want to see 
your face again. 

78 



Act II 

JOHN 

I'd go. 

LISA 

To stay? 

JOHN 

Of course. 

LISA 

Could you live without her? 

JOHN 

Yes, if I must. 

LISA 

Monstrous ! 

JOHN 

Mother dear, do you love my father? 
Would you mind telling me, that is . . . 

LISA 

Mind? Why should I? It is a privilege 
to have a great feeling to express and why 
should I keep it to myself? Imagine it, 
79 



Enter Madame 

Love? Why I can sing love as no one else 
can. 

(Sings.) 
" Vieni, vieni, fra le mie braccia, amove, de- 
lizia e vita non mi sarai rapita, fin ch io, ti 
string 7 cor" 

(Rises.) 
What a phrase, my God, what a phrase! 
What a phrase! Do you realize, you cold 
blocks who go to the opera, the soul that we 
burn before you, the melody pours like incense 
smoke from the censers that are our hearts? 

JOHN 

Yes, but is that loving father? 

LISA 

Why, you blockhead, do you believe I think 
of the fat little tenor with the short neck, and 
his eyes full of food, when I sing that ? 

JOHN 

But what good can it do father to have you 
sing to him when he isn't there? 
80 






Act II 

LISA 

We are almost always together in the 
summer. Oh the romance ! I always sing it 
all into my music afterwards. 

JOHN 

But don't you see . . . 

LISA 

(Testily.) 
No, I don't see — why I love him the most 
beautiful way! All my heart throbs in my 
throat — why do you suppose the birds sing? — 
for a living perhaps: . . . the nightingale 
for a thousand a night whistles her sorrows to 
the moon? No, it is the necessity to express 
in music the great tragedy of love, — it is 
the dramatic soprano of the birds, the lark 
is the lyric, the canary is the coloratura 
singer. 

JOHN 

But mother . . . 
6 81 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Oh, I cannot explain ... I wish I could — 
perhaps it is something like this . . . you 
know a little of electricity?, 

JOHN 

Well, I am going to be an electrical engineer 
one of these days. 

LISA 

It is a force — it is a force of life, hunting, 
hunting for a way to express itself. Some- 
times it finds cold blocks that it cannot move 
at all, that is a non-conductor, eh? Some- 
times it finds a way, and the rush of the 
force . . . 

JOHN 

. . . moves trains and ships, and lights 
cities? 

LISA 

{Hurriedly.) 
Yes, yes, I prefer the glory of the storm. 
82 



Act II 

JOHN 



Sheer waste. 



LISA 

Oh, I don't know about that, I only know 
that the storm is beautiful, moving, sublime! 
Now there is a force of feeling . . . hunting, 
hunting to express itself. 

JOHN 

The force of feeling, as you call it, lights 
hearths and makes homes. 

LISA 

Yes, yes, and the storm of feeling makes art ! 
I am a cross current ! 

JOHN 

Well, how can father enjoy life if you short 
circuit him all the time. . . . 

LISA 

{Struck suddenly.) 
I don't know, I don't know. I only know 
83 



Enter Madame 

that I am unhappy. I wander about here 
touching the things that belong to him. I 
sit here in his chair 

(Sits there.) 
and imagine that I am curled up in his lap, 
only the arms don't come together around 
me . . . they just stick out — 

(lisa beats the arms of the chair in a fit 
of childish temper; then suddenly 
remembers her son.) 
Oh, how can I make you understand — you, 
young, you with your quiet love and your cold 
science. You see, it's like a little message 
over you, Marconi that has got lost. Some- 
times one hears them weakly beating against 
the keys across leagues of stormy seas. 
S. O. S. S. O. S. Oh, give my love back to 
me — or I die! 

(john takes her in his arms.) 

JOHN 

Mother dear, I wish I could help you — 
can't you accept Weissman's offer? It would 
84 



Act II 

take your mind off things. Wouldn't singing 
help you to forget? 

LISA 

Oh, no, John dear, music vibrates in the 
memory. My life with Gerald is so closely 
woven through with song, that if they were to 
pluck my Gerald out, the rest would fall in 
little heaps of ravellings all about. Oh, I could 
not bear to sing. 

JOHN 

What are we to do, mother? 

LISA 

(Restlessly.) 
Yes. What are we to do? What are 
we to do? I have thought of many things. 
I've thought of many ways to win him 
back, but he's not like other men, he pricks 
my little bubbles — he'd say : Come off, Lisa, 
come off — don't act — and what am I to 
do? 

85 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

It doesn't seem to me it's any use thinking 
of romance now. I'm not quite sure it would 
be dignified. Father's not behaved very well. 

LISA 

He's been a pig. 

JOHN 

That ' s j ust it . If you were to go on refusing 
to see him and to go away without a word it 
would be no more than he deserves. 

LISA 

Oh, no, I couldn't bear to do that. 

JOHN 

Well then, see him once, shake hands with 
him quietly, say that you hope he will be 
happy. . . . 

LISA 

I'll wear my black velvet trimmed with 
chincilla! . . . 

86 



Act II 

JOHN 

That you will think of him kindly and that 
you hope he will be happy. 

LISA 

You said that before. 

JOHN 

It sounds dignified. 

LISA 

But you don't have to say it twice, once 
will do. 

JOHN 

Well, anything you like, but . . . 

{Enter gerald, he stands irresolute, 
holding his hat.) 

LISA 

Ah! 

(john makes movement to get out. lisa 
holds him back.) 
John come back at eight and bring Aline. 
(Kisses him.) 

87 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

(At door.) 
Good evening, sir . . . 

GERALD 

Good evening, see you soon. 
(Exit JOHN.) 

LISA 

Won't you — sit down? I must apologize 
for my costume. I have been asleep, and then 
John came — et — me void. . . . This is 
scarcely the costume for a divorcee. I must 
be careful now. 

GERALD 

Never mind your clothes. I broke in on 
you, — I . . . have been wanting to see you 
since that awful day. I didn't want you to 
go away remembering the things I said. I 
don't know what came over me, I think it was 
because you tried to make a fool of me. 

LISA 

I tried to make a fool of you ! 



Act II 

GERALD 

You did, you know, Lisa — you did try . . . 

LISA 

The other lady never tries to make fool of 
you? 

GERALD 

Oh, dear no, she hasn't the wit. 

LISA 

Oh, I don't know, a woman's wit it isn't 
always on the surface. 

GERALD 

It's you I want to speak of. I was so 
beastly about your age, as if you could help it. 

LISA 

Gerald, you know you are not my husband 
any more and I must have respect from men 
who are not my husband. 

GERALD 

Good Heavens, I don't know what I'm 
saying. I was so afraid you'd slip away with- 
89 



Enter Madame 

out my having another glimpse of you. You 
know you look exquisitely young tonight. 

LISA 

{Furiously jumping to her feet.) 
Again my age, but you know, Gerald, I am 
getting tired of my age ! 

{Enter archimede with a large cooked 
goose on a platter.) 

ARCHIMEDE 

Si po' Signora cosa ne dice, eh? Cold roast 
goose ! 

GERALD 

The bird of peace ! 

ARCHIMEDE 

Si Signore! Stuffed with capon, sweet 
breads, sausage meat, and rosemary. . . . 

LISA 

{Sniffing joyfully.) 
Truffles — mushrooms, macaroons, and 
cream. 

90 



Act II 

ARCHIMEDE 

All chopped ver' fine. 

LISA 

A dash of Tokay wine. 

GERALD 

Ah, frankincense and myrrh — oh dreams of 
Araby ! 

LISA 

I have it, I have it. 

GERALD 

What's that? 

LISA 

(Triumphantly.) 
You come and sup with me! 

GERALD 

By Jove ! 

LISA 

And bring the lady. 
9i 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

What! 

LISA 

Why not? The bird of peace — a nice cold 
supper. ... I have a good champagne. . . . 

ARCHIMEDE 

Bravi, bravi! 

LISA 

Can you get ready quickly? 

ARCHIMEDE 

I have a salad that is a dream of spring ! 

LISA 

Gerald — rush, get the lady! I dress — like 
a flash! 

GERALD 

By Jove, Lisa, you can't be beat! 
92 



Act II 

LISA 

You bet your life I can't be beat! Bice! 
Bice! 

(Runs to door R.) 
(Enter bice r.) 

BICE 

Si, Signora. . . . 

LISA 

Signor Gerald is coming to supper ! Is not 
that splendid! 

BICE 

(With a cry of joy.) 
Ah ! Grazie al cielo ! 

LISA 

And he bring the nice lady that he is to 
marry! 

BICE 

Oh, my God . . . Ma per eke' invitare 
quella donna! 

93 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Sta cheta! lascia fare a me! Mi metto il 
. . . nuovo Paquin! Corri da brava fac- 
ciamo una toilette coi fiocchi ! 

(Runs to C.) 

(bice exit.) 
Dottore! Miss Smith, quick! quick! 

(Enter doctor and miss smith L. C.) 

(R. C. ARCHIMEDE follows with tray, 
table-cloth, etc.) 
My husband is coming to supper with the 
lady he loves. We have supper as soon as 
possible. Be darlings and help to get ready. 

(Exit lisa into bedroom.) 

DOCTOR 

Per baccol With joy, with joy! 

MISS SMITH 

(Stays rooted on the door-sill a second.) 

DOCTOR 

Come, come, Miss Smith, your reactions 
are too slow. 

94 



Act II 

MISS SMITH 

Oh, all right, all right. 

DOCTOR 

The great secret of speed is scientific or- 
ganization, efficiency. 

MISS SMITH 

Give me a sample by moving that divan 
into that corner. 

DOCTOR 

All right. Archimede una mano. 
{They move divan.) 

MISS SMITH 

Be careful. Don't jam the furniture. 

ARCHIMEDE 

It's all right, Miss Smith. It no belong to 
Madame anyway. 

MISS SMITH 

There's a foreigner for you. Now, move 
the table down a little, now the table-cloth. 
95 



Enter Madame 

My word is she going to eat off brocade again ? 
I should think under the circumstances she'd 
like to eat like a Christian. 

DOCTOR 

Oh, Miss Smith, you have not the soul of 
the Artist. 

MISS SMITH 

No, thank God. 

ARCHIMEDE 

(Throws napkins in places.) 

MISS SMITH 

Stop throwing things. Where do you think 
you are. This isn't an Italian table d'hote. 
(During the setting of the table lisa is 
heard singing off R. while dressing 
for supper.) 

ARCHIMEDE 

All right Miss Smith. 
96 



Act II 

MISS SMITH 

Oh, we have enough singing. Let's have 
some supper. 

{The table is ready. The doctor enters 
with two candles, placing them on 
the table.) 

LISA 

(OffR.) 
Non Scordate lo Champagne dottore. 

DOCTOR 

Di certo lo champagne. 
{Door-bell rings.) 
(bice runs to open. Enter JOHN and 

ALINE.) 

LISA 

{Entering.) 
My God, the babies! 

JOHN 

Mother, you'd already forgotten that you'd 

asked us to come. 

7 97 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

I just remember with a shock of joy. The 
darling children ! 

(Kisses them warmly.) 

ALINE 

Oh, how beautiful you are ! 

\ 

LISA 

You look sweet, my darling, go in to Bice ; 
lay your wraps aside, look in my glass with 
the pink lights and see how beautiful you are. 

(Exit aline into bedroom.) 

(lisa turns to john.) 

JOHN 

What a lot of places — who's coming? 

LISA 

My Gerald and Mrs. Preston. 

JOHN 

What? 

98 



Act II 

LISA 

I followed your advice, you say, "see him 
once say that you hope he will be happy." 
This is much better; I will make the speech 
to both. 

JOHN 

It's a good idea. Of course it's unconven- 
tional, but it's sporting and dignified. I am 
sorry you let Aline come. Aline should not 
be in on this. 

LISA 

Why not? It's such a good supper. 

JOHN 

Well, it isn't exactly the situation in which 
to put a young girl. 

LISA 

Mercy, John, where did you get all your 
beautiful propriety. 

JOHN 

Someone had to have it in this family. 
{Enter aline.) 

99 



Enter Madame 

ALINE 

Your room is so exotic I love it ! I am going 
to be just like you when I get married. 
(lisa roars with laughter.) 
{Enter gerald and mrs. preston.) 

GERALD 

{Introducing.) 
Mrs. Preston, Mme. Delia Robbia! 

LISA 

{After a pause they meet in front of 
table and shake hands.) 
Delighted. It was so good of you to come. 

FLORA 

It was charming of you to ask me. 

LISA 

Just a little family supper. You belong in 
the family now you know. I don't know yet 
just exactly what relation we are to be to one 
ioo 



Act II 

another, but something surely. My English 
is so shaky. Wives-in-law, is it not? 
(gerald stamps his foot angrily.) 

FLORA 

I couldn't say — what an idea 

LISA 

Well at any rate I feel sure that we should 
not be strangers. We have so much in com- 
mon now. 

{Enter doctor and miss smith.) 

My dear family, Mrs. Preston. My doctor, 
my secretary, of course you know the 
children. Mrs. Preston, you sit at the head 
of the table. Gerald, you next to Mrs. Pres- 
ton — of course. Aline there, Miss Smith 
here. John on the other side of Mrs. Preston ; 
and Dottore near me. It is not a well bal- 
anced dinner party, it would never do in a 
storm, but perhaps it will sail successfully in 
these calm and sunny seas. 

(bice and archimede serve the supper.) 
1 01 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

Truffles, by Jove, you know. Truffles don't 
taste like anything as they cook them on this 
side. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Those truffles come from my farm in Tus- 
cany. Radames and I hunt for them last 
June, he with his nose and I with my stick to 
hit him over the head whenever he find a 
truffle; he loves truffles, that Radames. 

FLORA 

Mercy, who's Radames, your son? 

ARCHIMEDE 

No, my pig, Madame, a great hunter of 
truffles. 

FLORA 

What a strange name for a pig. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Why not Madame? He enjoys it, poor 
fellow, it gives him style before the other pigs. 

102 



Act II 

My cow I name Aida, my ox Don Bartolo — 
they are all ver' pleased. 

GERALD 

So you will retire to your farm when you 
get old? 

ARCHIMEDE 

Oh, well, some day! I am young yet! 

GERALD 

By Jove, doctor, that reminds me, why 
aren't you in Rimini? I thought you had 
bought a little practice there and had gone to 
settle down for the rest of your life? 

DOCTOR 

Oh, yes, I did leave Madame two years ago, 
the last time you and Madame were together 
in Viareggio. I had the rheumatism and I got 
the home sickness. I run down to Rimini 
where is my old sister. Her husband is dead, 
her daughter is married. So she say, why you 
run all around the world in your rheumatism? 
Stay here, I cook for you. So I stay. 
103 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

Well, weren't you happy? 

DOCTOR 

Oh, yes, the people are healthy in Rimini. 
I have little to do. My sister cook well, my 
rheumatism go. 

GERALD 

Well, why didn't you stay? 

DOCTOR 

Well, I tell you. An opera company come to 
Rimini and they give La Forza del Destino, I 
go. The soprano is a cow. I beat my head 
against the seat in front and I yell: No! no! 
no! non e cosi che si dice corpo di Bacco! 
And I run out. Imagine I hear Bartelozzi in 
Milan 

LISA 

Oh, Bartelozzi. 

DOCTOR 

Of course she does not compare with 
Madame but she is a very good dramatic. 
104 



Act II 

BICE 

Ma che — la Bartelozzi non sa cantare. 

DOCTOR 

Come non sa cantare. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Se parlasse delta Cantini. . . . 

BICE 

Ma die! la Cantini — canta come una cag- 
netta scorticata. 

(There is a general uproar.) 

DOCTOR 

Ma tu trovi a ridire di tuttel la Bartelozzi 
e una grande artista. 

GERALD 

(Goes to archimede and pulls him 

away. After quieting them all, he 

resumes his place at table.) 

Ah si quello e vero grande artista. I've 

heard her in lots of things. She sings Valen- 

tina in the Huguenots magnificently you know. 

105 



Enter Madame 

DOCTOR 

Ecco! II Signor Geraldo, he say so too and 
he is a connoisseur in the aria with the tenor ; 
what a beauty ! Scusateme, I will play it for 
you. 

ARCHIMEDE 

I get my flute. 

LISA 

Yes, yes, Archimede, get the flute. 

(archimede exits and enters with flute. 
Goes to piano and plays.) 

GERALD 

{Goes to lisa, listens to music; almost 
involuntarily he takes her in his arms 
and kisses her; just as abruptly he 
releases her as flora gasps in her 
fury.) 

BICE 

{Interrupting music.) 
Gia — just what I say. 

{Imitates the exaggerated sentimentality 
of the interpretation.) 
1 06 



Act II 

So sentimental and languid — it make your 
stockings fall down. 

{They all return to their places at the 
table.) 

(archimede exits.) 

LISA 

Bice, per V amor di Dio, ti Scordi davanti 
alia sposa Americana! 

BICE 

Madonna mial 

GERALD 

Pass the salad ! Have some salad, Flora? 

FLORA 

Thank you, not any more. 

GERALD 

Oh — so you left Rimini, doctor? 

DOCTOR 

Yes, the music is in the blood worse than 
the rheumatism, it make me suffer more; and 
107 



Enter Madame 

the memories stab my heart a hundred times 
a day; — and pictures of the past come up 
quickly in idle moments. A great life of 
pictures — we lead — I could not stand to give 
pills and powders — Madame took me back 
and here I am. 

GERALD 

A great life of pictures. 

DOCTOR 

Well, Signor Gerald, this is the last of the 
jolly little suppers. 

GERALD 

Your health, doctor. 

DOCTOR 

We have drink the health together in every 
corner of the globe. Cairo, Petrograd, Buenos 
Ayres, Milan — it was not a bad little life. 

GERALD 

Yes, it was a good little life while it lasted. 
108 



Act II 

FLORA 

Madame Delia Robbia, I hear you are to 

be married again ? 

LISA 

(Surprised.) 

JOHN 

What's that mother, you never mentioned 
it to me. Now that father's gone you ought 
to advise with me you know. 

GERALD 

Dash it all, don't you talk as if I were 
dead. 

FLORA 

Gerald told me of your wonderful romance 
with a poet. I understood him to say you 
were engaged! 

JOHN 

Why mother! 

109 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

I haven't the faintest idea of what you are 
talking about! 

(The telephone rings.) 
Miss Smith, will you answer that ? 

MISS SMITH 

(At phone.) 
Hello . . . yes, this is her secretary . . . 
Oh, no, we haven't decided yet — you see 
Madame has been so busy — oh, the steamer 
starts tomorrow? — well, then it's too late — 
we couldn't possibly be off so quickly. 

LISA 

Who is that? 

MISS SMITH 

It's Weissman, he says this is his last chance, 
that the Vasari leaves for Buenos Ayres to- 
morrow. He wants to know if you won't 
sign that contract. He's secured passage on 
the chance that you'll decide to go. 

(Into phone.) 
Yes — wait a minute. Heavens he's weeping. 
no 



Act II 

LISA 

{Suddenly.) 
We go to Buenos Ayres tomorrow. 

MISS SMITH 

But the boat leaves at one. 

LISA 

We go at one tomorrow. 

MISS SMITH 
{To LISA.) 

Do you really mean it, Madame? 

LISA 

Yes, I mean it. 

MISS SMITH 

{Into phone.) 
Yes, madame will be there. Yes, parole 
d'honneur — go ahead and make the arrange- 
ments. Oh, all right, all right. 

LISA 

{On her feet — raising her glass.) 
Brindisi! To life, that outruns Chance and 
in 



Enter Madame 

Love and Death ! To Life the Winner of the 
Race! 

GERALD 

he morituri Salutamus! 

LISA 

Ah la! la! not so! Brindisi! to my husband 
and his wife ! 

JOHN 

{Raising his glass.) 
To my wonderful mother! 

GERALD 

(Rises.) 
Let's get Archimede in and have the anvil 
chorus for the last time. 

FLORA 

Dear me, I feel as if I were at a funeral, 
with all these last rites. 

GERALD 

Oh I don't mean the Miserere! just the 
anvil chorus — Archimede makes a ripping 

112 




To Life, that outruns Chance and Love and Death! To Life, the 
winner of the race! " 



Act II 

noise \ Archimede you old scoundrel come 
here. 

BICE 

(Running to door.) 
Vieni, Archimede. 

GERALD 

Are you in voice, Bice? Bice's got a grand 
voice, wait till you hear her. 

(Enter archimede.) 
Here, Archimede, old boy, have a liqueur — 
and you too, Bice. Everybody — raise glasses ! 
To the virtuoso of the gas range our noble 
Archimede ! 

EVERYONE 

Bravo! Viva! 

GERALD 

To our Bice ! Long may her tongue wag ! 

EVERYONE 

Viva! 
8 113 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

To life. May its memories be gentle, its 
actualities charming, its anticipations keen. 

LISA 

The anvil chorus then 



{They all sing it together — all except 
flora, knocking on the glasses and 
plates and bottles for the noise of the 
anvils. The old song, the old memories 
sadden lisa, she cannot join, gerald 
sees it.) 

GERALD 

Stop, stop ! We are not in voice tonight. 

DOCTOR 

I always suffer from catarrah in this coun- 
try of yours. 

(Rising.) 
Now Madame, I hope you will excuse me, it 
is getting late and if we leave tomorrow there 
is much I must do. 

114 



Act II 

LISA 

Buona nolle, Doltore. 

DOCTOR 

Buona nolle, Signora. 

GERALD 

Hope to see you again doctor. 

DOCTOR 
Oh, without a doubt — goodnight, Signor 
Giovanni ! 

. (Down C. to john.) 
You will be a married man the next time we 
meet. Goodnight, Ladies. 
{Exits bowing.) 

MISS SMITH 

I'll go finish those letters, Madame, and ar- 
range for tomorrow. Goodnight, goodnight. 
{Exit.) 

JOHN 

{Rises and goes to lisa.) 
It's getting awfully late for Aline to be up. 
ii5 



Enter Madame 

I better take her home — do you want me to 
come back here afterwards? Do you need 
me? 

LISA 

No, my darling, but come tomorrow and 

bring Aline. I may need you then 

(As they are talking bice and archi- 
mede move the chairs back, clear the 
dishes, and put the room in order. 
They, however, according to foreign 
custom leave the glasses and bottles 
of wine on the table.) 

JOHN 

Come Aline, put your things on — it's 
awfully late. 

ALINE 

No, it's not late, Johnnie, surely you aren't 
going to 

(Coming down C. to front of table to meet 

LISA.) 

leave your mother so early on her last night? 
116 



Act II 

LISA 

He brings you again tomorrow, dear baby. 
He shall bring you early, very well ! at dawn — 
come at eleven o'clock John! Bice, bring 
Aline's cloak! I shall be back here for your 
wedding my little swallow. I shall help you 
to build your little nest. In the meantime, 
wear this necklace for me — the pearls seem a 
little dull — that is because I am not always hap- 
py — pearls are like that — on your breast they 
will soon shine again. To think I shall be your 
mother so soon ! 

GERALD 

Oh, they are awfully young, Lisa! It's too 
soon to talk that way ! 

LISA 

I am not sure, Gerald, perhaps if they grow 
up together, they will grow like a tree into one 
strong stem that cannot be divided. 

GERALD 

(Rises.) 

Well, it's not a bad idea, a tree can't pick 
117 



Enter Madame 

up its roots and take the next steamer to 
South America — or the first damned place 
that comes into its head. 

FLORA 

Gerald! 

LISA 

Goodbye, children, until tomorrow. . . . 

JOHN 

Goodnight, father. 

GERALD 

See here, when are you going back to 
college? 

JOHN 

As soon as mother's gone. 

GERALD 

See that you go back tomorrow. You've 
loafed long enough. 

118 



Act II 

JOHN 

All right, sir — goodnight. 

{Exit with aline and bice following.) 

GERALD 

Damn slacker. 

LISA 

I am glad to see him play a little, he is sucn 
an old sober sides. 

GERALD 

Puts on airs, needs taking down a peg or 
two, the young cub. 

LISA 

Don't let him work too hard, Gerald. 

GERALD 

I'd like to talk to you about him, and — and 
. . . other things as well, why the deuce 
must you run down to Buenos Ayres ! 

LISA 

Why not ! I shall earn a lot of money there, 
you know. 

119 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

You know I haven't had a chance to talk 
business to you. You wouldn't let my lawyer 
doit. 

LISA 

And I will not let you do it either, Gerald. 
I cannot talk business to any one. It is too 
depressing. Look at poor Flora! We must 
talk to Flora. 

GERALD 

I'll take Flora away and come back for a 
chat with you. I can't let you go like this 
and you've been so unreasonable all this time! 
Wouldn't see me and all that. 

LISA 

I will not talk of business, Gerald. 

GERALD 

Well, then, there's John — John and Aline! 
how's that? Just half an hour or so — you 
can't refuse me that, can you? 

I20 






Act II 

LISA 

Will Flora mind, perhaps? 

(flora has been wandering restlessly 
around the room — hearing this she 
stops.) 

FLORA 

{Down R. at end of table.) 
You want to talk to Gerald, do you ? Why 
of course. 

LISA 

(At L. end of table.) 
Gerald wants to talk to me. 

FLORA 

Oh, why naturally. 

GERALD 

Let me take you home first. 

FLORA 

(Going to lisa to offer her hand.) 
Oh, no, how absurd, it's only down stairs! 
Goodnight, Madame Delia Robbia — such an 

121 



Enter Madame 

unusual evening! I am really very grateful 
to you for it. I've never seen anything to 
equal it in all my life — quite extraordinary. 

LISA 

Is it really so extraordinary ! Perhaps you 
think me extraordinary ? 

FLORA 

Oh dear me yes, but I suppose you have to 
be like that, if you were not, people wouldn't 
pay so much money to see you on the stage. 
You must give them something different to 
look at I dare say. 

LISA 

You know, it's very puzzling ! To myself I 
seem quite simple. 

FLORA 

Perhaps it comes from throwing yourself 
into every part you are doing. You throw 
yourself out of joint as it were and end by not 
knowing how to behave at all. However, I 

122 



Act II 

am delighted to have met you. I understand 
Gerald so much better now. I am glad to 
have had this glimpse into your vivid domes- 
tic atmosphere, you are so very original, 
Madame Delia Robbia, I daresay you make a 
business of that. But you have behaved 
most becomingly on the whole. Really 
amazingly well. 

LISA 

{Meekly.) 
Oh, thank you, so much ! 

FLORA 

The situation might have been very un- 
pleasant. Two women squabbling over a 
man you know, — oh, dreadful! Instead it's 
been only the question of righting something 
that had been wrong for many years. Now 
it's over, would you mind kissing me ? 

(gerald, who has been walking nervously 
up and down the hallway up C, enters 
in time to see them kiss and leaves the 
room hurriedly.) 
123 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Delighted! Are we not wives-in-law? 
{They kiss strenuously.) 

FLORA 

Men are such helpless creatures, that we 
women must take these things into our own 
hands. There it's all over, what a relief, 
aren't you relieved ? 

LISA 

Tremendously. 

GERALD 

{Entering again.) 
Flora are you coming ? 

FLORA 

Yes Gerald darling. 

{Going slowly up with LISA to exit door 
where gerald is waiting to show her 
out.) 
Of course we won't be likely to meet in the 
future. 

124 



Act II 

LISA 

I am afraid not. 

FLORA 

In the meantime I'll leave him in your care. 

LISA 

Oh, so good of you to trust me. 

FLORA 

Don't let him tire you. Send him home 
soon ! Goodnight ! 

LISA 

Goodnight, goodnight. 

(flora and gerald exit, lisa hurries 
to piano, powders her face ready for 
battle, gerald enters thoughtfully.) 

GERALD 

(Coming down C.) 
Perhaps I am intruding, taking your time. 



125 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Oh, dear me no. I am a bird of the night 
you know. 

GERALD 

(Both sit in front of table.) 
A nightingale. 

LISA 
Of course. 

GERALD 

Lisa, I don't want you to change your way 
of living, I always want to be quite at your 
service financially, you know. 

LISA 

Oh, money, Gerald, I haven't thought of it 
for years. 

GERALD 

That's right, just go on not thinking of it. 
When your money gives out, send the bills 
to me. 

126 



Act II 

LISA 

Of course you know that I will not do that; 
now — let's talk about John. 

GERALD 

John's all right. I don't think that children 
are the absorbing topic of discussion between 
parents, that they are supposed to be. You 
and I never discussed John much in our life. 

LISA 

He didn't seem to need it. There's been 
very little that we could do for him. He's so 
healthy, self-reliant. It seems to me now on 
looking back that I have often worried about 
you, never about him and yet oh I love him. 

GERALD 

I know how you feel, the little nuisance 
even refused to have the measles. John never 
did his duty by us really. I was always 
hoping he'd get into some mess or other as 
he grew up. If it hadn't been for you . . . 
well, God knows you did your best. . . .' 
127 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Yes, I know. I have been irritating, selfish, 
I have never given you comfort, you've lived 
in the tents of the Arabs long enough, I don't 
blame you for wanting to leave them. 

GERALD 

Let me take care of you in the future. 

LISA 

No Gerald, I can't do that. 

GERALD 

Lisa dear, don't you know that it's 
dangerous to take away all the trouble of a 
person at once? A man can't stop smoking, 
or taking a drug all at once. He has to do it 
gradually — well it's same thing with trouble. 

LISA 

Perhaps Flora will have some nice new 
ones. 

GERALD 

No hope of that. The great silence will 
128 



Act II 

close over me. People will go about saying 
the same things, making the same gestures. 
Peace, three meals . . . 

LISA 

{Hopefully.) 
In America there are beautiful servant 
troubles ! 

GERALD 

No, Tamamoto is back with me — so there's 
no hope in that direction. Let me pay your 
bills! 

LISA 

{Smilingly.) 
Not a bill. 

GERALD 

{Rises.) 
Lisa, you only do that to be irritating and 
contrary. Every time I think of something 
for my happiness it is always the one thing 
you refuse me. 

9 129 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Now it is my fault again! . . . Gerald, 
you know I have not forgot what you said to 
me the first day I came back — that I had been 
only a magnificent mistress to you. . . . 

GERALD 

(Sits again.) 
Oh, Lisa, I would give anything to wipe out 
the words I said that day . . . it's always so 
when we get together — you drive me to it, I 
always say things I don't mean. 

LISA 

The trouble is that there is always just 
enough truth in them. 

GERALD 

No' truth at all, — I'd smash any man who 
dared to ... I can't imagine what made me 
. . . Gad, I know, I remember now. It was 
that damned poet you were going to marry. 
What's become of him, Lisa? . . . 
130 






Act II 

LISA 

There is no one! There never has been 
any one. Is there anything else you wish to 
talk about? 

GERALD 

No, no, I suppose not. 

(Music of flute and piano heard off 

stage.) 
(Telephone rings, lisa goes to it.) 
What's that music, Lisa? 

LISA 

It's Archimede and the Doctor. Alio, alio, 
oh Flora, yes Flora he is still here, — you want 
him? At once, you shall have him. 
(Comes down to front of table.) 

GERALD 

(At phone.) 

Yes, Flora, what is it? We're getting along 

nicely. These things take time you know. 

Yes. I'll see that I get plenty of sleep. I'm 

not made of cotton wool. Yes, in the morning. 

131 



Enter Madame 

What? At ten o'clock? Yes, I'll be there 
promptly. All right, you can expect me. 
What? Yes, I am just off now. Goodnight, 
goodnight. 

(Rings off.) 

GERALD 

(Goes slowly to lis A.) 
I must go now, Lisa. I scarcely know you 
in this mood; no tricks; no florid speeches; 
no poetry ; perhaps you are glad to get rid of 
me. Haven't you anything to say? 

LISA 

No. 

GERALD 

Goodbye then, goodbye romance, youth, 
adventure; as wayward as my thoughts, as 
graceful as my dreams, as changeable as my 
desires ; a butterfly with wonderful wings, but 
with emotion instead of a heart. 

LISA 

Ah ! How dare you, how dare you say such 
things to me. 

132 



Act II 

GERALD 

I know, I have no right to say such things 
to you, yet they are true. You know that 
they are true. 

LISA 

Oh, no. You have said it yourself. As 
wayward as my thoughts, as changeable as 
my desires, I was what you wished me to be. 
I was taught young that my duty was to 
please and to win applause. An interpreter, 
that is what I am, that is all you wished me 
to be. You could have made of me what you 
wished. Oh, why didn't you try? And now 
you blame me. 

(Lays her head on Gerald's breast, 
sobbing.) 

GERALD 

Darling, I don't blame you, I blame myself. 

LISA 

Yet you punish me, for being just me ! 
133 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

How was I to know! I am a blundering 

ass. 

{Phone rings — angrily goes to door up 

c.) 

Stop that damned noise ! 
{Music stops.) 

LISA 

{Goes to phone.) 
Alio! alio! 

{Quickly lays down receiver and shouts.) 
It is she again. 

{Goes down R.) 

GERALD 

{Yells into phone.) 
Hello! Hello! What — yes I know you're 
not deaf! I beg pardon . . . what is it? I 
know it's late. You ought to be in bed. Of 
course I'm thinking of you — what's that? 
Nonsense, Flora. After all I'm alone with 
my own wife. 

(lisa crosses left, gleefully.) 
134 



Act II 

Well, what's wrong with that? It's true isn't 
it? Oh, by Jove, I'd forgotten — honest I had 
— yes . . . yes, I'll go. Well I can't go till 
you hang up the receiver, can I? Oh rubbish. 
Goodnight. 

(Hangs up.) 

LISA 

Poor Flora, how old she is ! 

GERALD 

I am a year or two older than Flora. 

LISA 

, Oh, no we are young, you and I Gerald, 
young! because we still have imagination, 
illusion, because we still see people as they 
are not ! That is the secret of youth. Yet the 
world insists upon imposing age upon us, 
because it is respectable. We are the hope of 
the world if they only knew. The irrecon- 
cilables. But now once more the world has 
won and you are going to join the great 
phalanx of the old ! 

135 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

The hell I am ; come here you imp of Satan, 
I'll show you how old I am. 

LISA 

(Runs upstage and around to front of 
piano.) 
The great god Pan is dead. 

GERALD 

(Takes her in his arms.) 
Oh, Lisa, listen to me. Say you love me, 
say you love me. What are we to do? What 
can we do ? 

LISA 

(Her arms around his neck.) 
Ah, Gerald, Gerald; I don't know, I can't 
help you. 

GERALD 

(Holding her desperately.) 
Say it isn't too late, say it isn't too late! 
136 



Act II 

LISA 

I seem to hear the sands rushing out, it is 
almost too late. 

(The phone rings. gerald turns 
angrily towards it. lisa slips into 
the bedroom, and leaves the door ajar. 
The phone rings like mad. gerald 
grabs his hat in a panic. Then looks 
at the bedroom door, has an idea, 
looks at the phone, hesitates, finally 
makes up his mind y throws down his 
hat, lifts the receiver gently off, lays it 
on the table, goes softly into the bed- 
room and shuts the door.) 

(Enter bice from back with a glass and a 
small carafe of water on a tray. She 
sees Gerald's hat, looks at bedroom 
door, then quietly without fuss, she 
puts another glass on the tray and 
knocks gently on the bedroom door, as 
the curtain comes down.) 

CURTAIN 

137 



ACT III 

It is morning — a nice frosty sunny morning. 
A small table is prepared for breakfast in 
front of the fireplace. It is carefully laid with 
a lace cloth — a low bouquet of orange blossoms 
in the middle of the table. A profusion of 
white flowers is scattered all about the room. 
bice and archimede are tiptoeing about 
arranging everything, wreathed in happy 
smiles, talking in a careful undertone, bice 
has white satin bows in her cap, white lace 
apron ornamented with bows, with sprigs of 
orange blossoms in her corsage, archimede 
is freshly starched and has a large white bow 
with orange blossoms on his breast. 

BICE 

{Speaks with elation.) 
Ecco finito. . . . 

ARCHIMEDE 

Grazioso come un nido di colombe! 
138 



Act HI 

{Starts to sing in a soft undertone after 
few bars; bice joins him and they 
sing the first verse of a popular love 
song, in as low a voice as possible, 
but with great glee:) . 

" Vamore e una catena 
Uamore e una catena, 
Uamore eu una catena 
Che non si spezza 
E se si spezza Olil OH! Ola! 
Se si spezza mamma, nia 
La si po raccomeda 
La, la la, la, la la, la, la, etc." 

{They both dance around the room.) 
{Enter miss smith with hat and coat — 
she comes from outdoors.) 

MISS SMITH 

My word, what is the matter with the two 
of you? Isn't Madame up yet? I've done a 
dozen errands. I've had a talk with Weiss- 
man. She can't loiter over breakfast this 
139 



Enter Madame 

morning, it's nearly half past ten, and you 
two losing time like this. What are all the 
flowers for? What is the matter with you? 
Of all the irresponsible crew ! Why don't you 
call Madame, Bice, you've got to get an early 
start with the packing. 

BICE 

{Romantically.) 
Ah, mademoiselle, you do it. I haven't the 
heart. . . . 

MISS SMITH 

What in the world . . . 

ARCHIMEDE 

Cannot Mademoiselle guess, it is in the 
air. . . . 

BICE 

You can hear the whirring wings of the 
little loves if you will listen. 

MISS SMITH 

I think you've both gone mad ! 
140 



Act HI 

BICE 

The perfume of the orange blossoms — does 
it not suggest something to you ? 

MISS SMITH 

It certainly suggests that you should open 
the window — it makes the room very close- 
I'll knock up Madame. 

(bice and archimede run after her.) 

BOTH 

My God! No! 

MISS SMITH 

{Stopping at the door.) 
Why not? 

BICE 

{Beckons her away.) 
Come back, come back, and don't touch 
the door. . . . 

(miss smith walks away puzzled at the 
frantic gestures of the others.) 
141 



Enter Madame 

MISS SMITH 

What's happened? 

BICE 

(Whispering.) 
Signor Gerald . . . sh ! sh ! sh ! 

(miss s. looks from one to the other — 
they continue gesticulating frantically.) 

miss smith 
You mean? You don't mean! . . . Mr. 
Fitzgerald is . . . my word ! 

BICE 

No more unhappiness for my Signora. 

ARCHIMEDE 

And such dinners ! 

MISS SMITH 

(Who has got her breath.) 
You are a pair of renegades — I've stood a 
good deal from Mme. Delia Robbia first and 
last, but — well! this sort of thing never 
142 



Act HI 

happened before — this is too much. My 
word ! 

BICE 

What is it that makes you so shocked? Is 
it not her husband? 

MISS SMITH 

Her husband . . . he's not her husband 
any more is he? If he is, he's committing 
bigamy or something. T'isn't legal, I tell 
you. 

{Enter doctor.) 

DOCTOR 

{Seeing the flowers.) 
Ah, very nice, good idea — very charming ! 

MISS SMITH 

Doctor, what shall we do? Do you know 
what's happened? 

DOCTOR 

Well I can guess ... do I not smell the 
orange blossoms, charming idea Bice. Come 
143 



Enter Madame 

Miss Smith — your morality will suffer ner- 
vous prostration if you are not careful. She's 
a wonderful woman, Madame. Let us run 
or they will catch us. . . . 

MISS SMITH 

What about South America? 

DOCTOR 

Leave that to Madame. . . . 

MISS SMITH 

But the boat leaves at one ! 

DOCTOR 

Leave everything to Madame. She's a 
great general ! 

BICE 

Quick, quick they come. 

(The doctor and miss smith run out. 
bice and archimede are up C.) 

GERALD 

(Entering from off R.) 
Good-morning, everybody. 

[He is in high good spirits.) 
144 



Act III 

BICE 

Good-morning, ver' happy to see you again. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Ver' happy, ver* happy ! 
(Runs off.) 

GERALD 

Well, well, Bice, orange blossoms n' every- 
thing, eh? 

BICE 

Si Signore, my prayers have been answered, 
and we are all content. 

GERALD 

You're a good soul, Bice. 

(Enter lisa in an adorable negligee.) 

LISA 

Buon giorno, Bice. 

GERALD 

(Sings*) 

Ah! Bella figlia dell amore ! 
145 



Enter Madame 

j 

LISA 

My Gerald ! you grow musical. 

GERALD 

Why not? You look lovely enough to 
drag a song out of a hippo. Doesn't she, Bice? 

BICE 

My Signora is happy at last! The saints 
be blessed! 

(lisa sits at table opposite gerald.) 

GERALD 

How will you like settling down in America, 
Bice? 

BICE 

Eh, what is? 

LISA 

{Pours coffee which bice passes to 

GERALD.) 

Yes, Bice, no more opera. I have decided 
firmly! From today, you and me, we raise 
chickens. 

146 



Act HI 

GERALD 

Ah, well, not quite that, but Mrs. Fitz- 
gerald and I will spend part of our time in 
the country down at Bellmore. You re- 
member our place at Bellmore, Bice, don't 
you? 

LISA 

v 
The big garden, the wide house with the 

chimney that is always smoking; it used to 

remind me of a very fat lady squatting in a 

meadow, smoking a pipe, too lazy to move. 

GERALD 

And the peace Bice ... oh the peace ! 

LISA 

The orchestra of the crickets ! Like — a far 
away rendition of Richard Strauss ' 

BICE 

(With distaste.) 
Oh la! la! 

147 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Oh, yes Bice, and the brasses are the 
frogs. . . . 

{Imitates.) 
Ra! Ra! Ra! Ra! Beautiful!! Wonderful!! 

BICE 

We do not go to South America then? % 

LISA 

Certainly not ! Of course not ! 

GERALD 

Certainly not, what an idea. Never heard 
of the place. I'm going to make a farmerette 
of Lisa. 

LISA 

I shall wear what they call — over-all — 
that is trousers ! So free for the country. . . . 

BICE 

Like Cherubino in Le Nozze di Figaro! 
148 



Act III 

LISA 

A good idea! You remember Gerald, how 
pretty I look as Cherubino in Le Nozze di 
Figaro! 

GERALD 

Oh, ripping, darling, ripping ! But what will 
John say to all this? 

(Rises, goes around arm-chair to lisa.) 

LISA 

Oh, Johnnie I forgot. . . . 
(bice goes out.) 

GERALD 

(Tenderly.) 
Never mind you shall wear what you like 
only promise me that you'll never leave me 
again. Promise me that ! 

LISA 

On my soul ! Henceforward I shall be like 
the shadow that the sun casts now to the 
149 



Enter Madame 

east, now to the west, but always close beside 
you. 

GERALD 

My Lisa! 

LISA 

Into your dear hands I place my life. I 
have no strength, no will, but yours. My 
Gerald. 

GERALD 

My wife, my beloved wife! Of course I 
don't expect you to give up everything at 
once, I don't mind you singing at a few per- 
formances at the Metropolitan for instance. 
(Kisses her and goes down L.) 

LISA 

And at Co vent Garden. Just once in a 
while. 

GERALD 

Well, yes — once in a great while, all right. 

LISA 

And at Milan, they would never forgive 
150 



Act III 

you if you didn't occasionally let me give 
them Delilah or Orpheus and oh, how they 
adore my Carmen! Just occasionally, is it not 
so — my Gerald. . . . 

GERALD 

{Much disturbed.) 
Now look here, let's get this settled. You'll 
be off again before I know it ! 

LISA 

{Quickly — rises and goes to gerald.) 
Oh no ! no ! Not unless you wish, only when 

you wish . . . perhaps never 

{Door -bell rings.) 
(gerald goes up to door.) 

BICE 

{Passing along corridor at back going 
toward the door.) 
I think it is the boy with the letters. 

{Noise of colloquy is heard at back — 
voices of mrs. preston and bice.) 
151 



Enter Madame 

BICE 

Madame is not dress. . . . 

FLORA 

It doesn't matter — that will do. . . . 

BICE 

But you cannot come in. 

FLORA 

I'd like to know who's going to keep me 
out! 

(bice backs toward door trying to stem 
the tide, lisa and gerald try to get 
away, but the panic has held them 
still in their places too long and they 
are caught.) 
That will do thank you. I can announce 
myself — good- morning ! 
{Down C.) 

GERALD 

(With bluff heartiness.) 
Good-morning, Flora, good-morning ! Won't 
you sit down? 

152 



Act III 

FLORA 

No thank you! My stay will be a very 

short one, I simply wanted to make sure 

{She withers them with a glance. Ger- 
ald quails under it; lisa smiles 
triumphantly.) 
{Then to gerald.) 
You didn't answer the telephone last 
night. . . . 

GERALD 

I answered it three or four times. 

FLORA 

You know what I mean perfectly well. 
I tried to reach you for hours. Finally the 
operator told me the receiver was off. 

GERALD 

It must have fallen off. 

FLORA 

Don't interrupt! Do you think I am a 
fool? Your behaviour to me has been simply 
153 



Enter Madame 

scandalous. Well, what excuse have you to 
offer? 

(gerald stands in front of her like a 
naughty child.) 
I only wish my dear husband was alive, he'd 
deal with you properly. As it is I've put my 
affairs in the hands of my lawyers. They will 
call upon you and this lady who is not your 
wife. You cannot trifle with my reputation 
and social position, and put me on a level 
with a common opera singer. 

GERALD 

Now Mrs. Preston . . . 

FLORA 

Keep still, or it will go worse with you. 
And please remember that agreement about 
a settlement — I shall expect one and don't 
forget it. There's such a thing as law and 
public opinion. They'll be on my side and 
they'll make you pay. Oh, don't imagine that 
you've broken my heart. It's much better 
this way. Do you think any woman would 
154 



Act III 

want you if it weren't that you are wealthy 
and can provide a good establishment? What 
do you suppose this woman wants of you 
except to pay her disgraceful debts and to 
cover her liasons with dukes and princes and 
what not ! 

GERALD 

Now Mrs. Preston. Confine your remarks 
to me, please. 

FLORA 

{Hysterically.) 
Oh, I'm not through with you yet. You — 
you — libertine, — with your talk of home and 
carpet slippers. I won't have to take care of 
you now in your stuffy old age, but you'll 
see to it that my nest is feathered or I'll know 
the reason why! Oh I'm not through with 
you yet. Oh! no! you wait! You just wait! 
Good-day to you both ! 

GERALD 

Phew! What a woman! 
155 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

(Recovering. Going up C.) 
How dare she, how dare she come into our 
house and talk so, and I — I couldn't answer 
back. 

GERALD 

(Sitting by table.) 
No, for the first time in your life darling. 
(Laughs.) 

LISA 

It is as if she were the wife. I should have 
said to her : ' ' Are you the wife ? ' ' 

GERALD 

Darling, you seem to forget that we are 
divorced, you and I. . . . 

LISA 

Yes, and whose fault is it ? It is hers ! I 
should have said to her : ' ' You come here and 
156 



Act III 

you steal my husband, and then you dare . . . 

you dare ..." 

(She turns and suddenly runs toward 
the door to catch mrs. preston and to 
say all the precious things to her face.) 

GERALD 

(Catches her and holds her in his arms.) 
Come back here. There, darling, there, 
never mind her. I'll pay the piper — it's 
worth it, just to have you back in my arms. 
We must get married now just as soon as 
possible. 

LISA 

(Absently.) 
Yes, 

(Then intensely.) 
but think — think of all the things I could 
have said to her! 

GERALD 

(Amused.) 
Yes, dear, I know all the things you could 
157 



Enter Madame 

have said to her. I'm glad you didn't say 
them. After all she's been handed a pretty 
rough deal; now let's forget her. 
(Door -bell rings.) 

LISA 

(john's voice is heard of stage.) 
Oh ! oh, it's John — I forget. 

GERALD 

Don't let him in. He mustn't see me in 
these clothes. 

(Rushes of R.) 

john and ALINE 
(Enter john and aline.) 
Hello, mother, is father here already? 

(lisa meets her son and aline at the 
door to give gerald a chance to 
escape.) 

LISA 

Hello, darling, yes, yes, he's here. 
158 



Act III 

JOHN 

Say what's happened now ? As I came into 
the lobby a reporter came up to me and asked 
if I was your son ; he asked where father was . I 
said I didn't know, he seemed awfully pleased 
about something. Mrs. Preston was down 
there talking to a group of men, they all turned 
and looked at us. I heard her say as I passed 
1 ' You'd better go and find out for yourselves. ' ' 
{There's a ring at the phone.) 

LISA 

I'll answer. I better answer. 
{At phone.) 
Alio ! Yes, it's me, who wants ... I cannot 
receive at this hour. Impossible! What! 
No I have not, I have no story for the press. 
Mr. Fitzgerald is not here. . . . How 
dare you . . . what business is it of yours. 
How dare you . . . how dare you . . . how 
dare you . . . 

{There's a ring at the door-bell, bice 
passes to answer.) 
159 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

(Rushes from room off R. to door up 
centre.) 
Bice, don't let them in. 

(70 LISA.) 

Flora has loosed the whole of the yellow press 
on us! 

LISA 

(Into phone.) 
How dare you ! I will call the police. I'll 
call the police. 

GERALD 

(Rushing down to her.) 
Lisa for God's sake don't talk like that to 
them. 

(lisa rings off.) 

JOHN 

(Who for the first time sees his father's 
clothes.) 
Father, what are you doing in your evening 
clothes? 

1 60 



Act HI 

GERALD 

(Walking hurriedly about stage.) 
I wear them all the time now — they are 
more becoming. 

JOHN 

I say! What do you mean by that? 

GERALD 

Ah, mind your own business. 
(Ring at the bell.) 

JOHN 

Look here sir, this is my business. 
(Phone rings.) 

GERALD 

Lisa, don't answer it. 

JOHN 

What do those men downstairs want? 
What is all this? What are you doing in 
evening dress at this time in the morning? 

(Then suddenly the truth bursts in upon 
him. Indignantly:) 
Oh! Oh! 

11 161 



Enter Madame 

GERALD 

Keep still, keep still and let me think. 

JOHN 

Oh! Oh! Good gracious. 

GERALD 

( Yelling.) 
Bice, get Archimede to answer the door, 
tell those men to go away. 

JOHN 

Oh! Oh! 

(Walks up and down.) 

GERALD 

You idiot, stop saying " oh. " Make yourself 
useful. 

JOHN 

We are disgraced ! Oh ! Oh ! 

GERALD 

Shut up! 

{Phone rings — bell rings.) 
(Enter archimede.) 
162 



Act III 

GERALD 

(QfiC.) 

Archimede take a rolling pin and go out 
there and persuade those men to leave. If 
they won't, carve them up. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Si Signore. 

GERALD 

Tell them there's no one here. 
(Phone rings.) 

JOHN 

You sir, go down to your club where you 
belong. You've no business here. 

GERALD 

Listen to him. 

LIZA 

John don't talk so to your father. 

JOHN 

Aline, you go by the back door, and run 

home — this is no place for you 

163 



Enter Madame 

ALINE 

But Johnnie, what is the matter with 
everybody? 

{Phone rings.) 

GERALD 

John answer that phone. Tell them to 
shut up. 

JOHN 

I won't unless you leave this house at once. 

GERALD 

If you say that again I'll thrash you within 
an inch of your life. 

JOHN 

No you won't — no you won't. And I will 
say it again ! 

{Phone rings, gerald seizes john and 
pushes him toward the phone.) 
Answer that phone ! 

LISA 

{Rushing to the rescue.) 
Answer it. Johnnie darling, please! For 
164 



Act III 

my sake, be careful what you say to them. 
My publicity depends upon them. 

JOHN 

(At phone.) 
Hello. Yes. Well, it's all a misunder- 
standing. I am her son. Yes . . . it's 
wrong, you've got it all wrong. . . . Well — 
well— Mrs. Preston is wrong— she— she- 
she's joking! 

GERALD 

You infernal idiot ! 

JOHN 

Well— what am I to say? 
(Into phone.) 
No, Madame Delia Robbia will see no one. 

LISA 

Now, Johnnie go down and tell them — tell 
them— oh, tell them anything but get them 

away. 

(Altercation is heard at the door.) 

165 



Enter Madame 

ARCHIMEDE 

Madame is alone with her son. She'll see 
no one. 

(Bangs door.) 

JOHN 

Bice, show Aline out the back door will you ? 
(bice takes aline away.) 
(john faces his parents furiously.) 
Now look here — you two. 

LISA 

(Phone rings.) 
Oh Johnnie, go down and tell them any- 
thing, only get them away. I'm going mad. 

JOHN 

First send father away — it isn't proper! 

LISA 

(An idea.) 
Gerald ! I know what we'll do, we'll go to 
South America ! 

GERALD 

Right, you're on. 

1 66 



Act III 

JOHN 

{Dramatically.) 
Stop ! Listen ! 

GERALD 

Stop, look, listen ! That's the way it goes, 
Johnnie. 

JOHN 

I'm serious! I was never more serious in 
all my life. 

GERALD 

Good Lord! 

LISA 

Quiet — Gerald ! 

JOHN 

You aren't married! Don't you remember 
you were divorced yesterday? 

LISA 

Oh, oh yes, I forgot. We both forgot. 
{Phone rings.) 
Oh John, tell them you are coming down to 
them! 

167 



Enter Madame 

JOHN 

I will if you promise to do just as I say. 
(gerald motions her to say yes.) 
{Phone rings.) 

LISA 

We'll do anything you want. 

JOHN 

{At phone.) 
Stop this noise. I am coming down to you. 
Yes this is Mr. Fitzgerald. I am coming. 

{Rings off.) 

{Turns to parents.) 
Now you'll do as I say. I've stood enough 
from you. You're an awful responsibility. 

GERALD 

{Loudly.) 
All right. Keep your voice down. Don't 
shout ! 

JOHN 

{Furiously.) 
Will you answer me one question? 
1 68 



Act III 

GERALD 

Certainly. 

JOHN 

Did I ask to be born? Did I ask to be 
born? Answer me that. 

GERALD 

{In a fit of laughter falls into the arm- 
chair, then recuperating:) 
Why, we gave you the gift of life. 

JOHN 

Oh, that's no good. That won't work now- 
adays. You tell me if it's right to treat me 
like this, when I never asked to be born. I 
didn't choose you to be my parents, God 
knows, but I've got to put up with you and 
you've got to put up with me. You can't go 
on living as if I weren't here. You've got to 
think of me, and of my future, and of the 

dignity of the family 

{Goes threateningly to gerald.) 
The dignity of the family, do you hear? 
169 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

Yes, yes, Johnnie, you are right. Now if 
you will go down and get those wicked re- 
porters away, — I promise that we will do 
anything you want, anything at all. 

GERALD 

There now. 

JOHN 

First I want to see father leave this house. 

LISA 

But he can't, at the door there are men. 

JOHN 

Well, he can go by the back door. 

LISA 

(Soothingly.) 
All right, Gerald, go by the back door, go 
by the back door. 

GERALD 

Well— I'll be . . . 
(Exits off R.) 

170 



Act III 

LISA 

There — there ... he is gone — Now you 
go down and save the family honour! The 
family honour, it rests with you ! 

JOHN 

All right, I will 

(Goes.) 

( You hear his voice outside) 
Here I am gentlemen — I can explain every- 
thing to you. 

(Outside — door closes.) 

(lisa rushes to bedroom door.) 

LISA 

Gerald — Gerald — come, — I know, I know 
what we will do ! 

GERALD 

What darling? 

LISA 

We will elope to South America 1 

GERALD 

Right you are. Can we make it? 
171 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

I'll send Miss Smith to Weissman. They 
will keep the steamer waiting as long as 
possible. We run with only a few things. 
The rest of the baggage follow later. 

GERALD 

All right, dear, you see Miss Smith, I won't 
be long. 

{Exits R.) 

LISA 

Miss Smith — Bice ! Come I want you. 
(lisa runs off stage at C.) 
{Enter tamamoto from back with a suit- 
case.) 

GERALD 

{Enters looking for his hat and comes 
face to face with tamamoto.) 
Tamamoto ! — how did you know I was here ? 

TAMAMOTO 

I know. I deduct. 

172 



Act III 

GERALD 

{Throwing his hat on the table.) 
You deduct! Japan will rule the world 
some day ; come here with that bag, hurry ! 
(Goes into bedroom with tamamoto.) 

LISA 

(Entering with bice. The doctor and 
archimede follow with portman- 
teaux.) 
Come Bice, Archimede, Dottore, you know 
what you have to do. 

(Rushes into bedroom with bice, archi- 
mede and the doctor begin packing 
the things that had been unpacked in 
Act I.) 

DOCTOR 

We must make the ship in twenty minutes, 
quick Archimede ! 

BICE 

(Reappearing.) 
Where is the rouge? ... Ah . . . 
eccolol eccolol . . . Presto, presto. 
173 



Enter Madame 

DOCTOR 

Non lo so — non lo so. . . . 

LISA 

{Entering half dressed.) 
My attar of roses ... I cannot elope 
without my attar of roses ! 

BICE 

Eccolo, eccolof 

(lisa rushes into bedroom.) 

DOCTOR 

Oh — Madonna mia — what a life ! 

ARCHIMEDE 

Viva la Baldoria! Dottore, we go to Bue- 
nos Ayres, eh? 

DOCTOR 

Yes ! yes ! 

ARCHIMEDE 

Do you remember my Carmencita, the girl 
that was ballerina at the opera? 
174 



Act III 

DOCTOR 

Why should I remember? Perhaps you 
have a reason. 

ARCHIMEDE 

Oh, la la! Let me see 



{Consulting address-book.) 
Amsterdam, Antwerp, — Bologna, Buenos 
Ayres. There! Ah, no! she is not my Car- 
mencita — she is my Dolores, oh la! la! she's 
my best girl ! 

DOCTOR 

{Seizes screen and small portmanteau. 
archimede follows with a hamper 
and they rush off. lis A enters in the 
same hat and coat she wore in the first 
act. She carries a small dog in her 
arms, gerald follows wrapped in a 
large overcoat, bice loaded down with 
hand luggage and tamamoto carry- 
ing a suitcase and a parrot cage close 
the procession.) 
175 



Enter Madame 

LISA 

{Triumphantly.) 
We go! We go! 

GERALD 

Hurry Tamamoto, Bice. 

LISA 

{Happily.) 
Now we run by the back door — here Gerald, 
you hold Toto ! 

GERALD 

{Suddenly.) 
No, no, Lisa, I won't. 

LISA 

But Gerald! 

GERALD 

Now look here darling, you are making me 
do all the things I swore I'd never do again. 
You're going off to sing — you drag me along 
and you want me to carry that damned pup. 
I won't do it, I tell you, I won't! 
176 



Act III 

LISA 

But Gerald — Madonna mia. We can't 
leave Toto. 

GERALD 

Very well, then, you can leave me. 
{Sits on sofa.) 

LISA 

(Phone rings.) 
Oh, Gerald — Gerald — not again! 

GERALD 

Oh, give me the damn dog. 

(Exits with dog under his arm. lisa 
follows.) 

BICE 

(Standing in doorway.) 
Exit Madame. 

CURTAIN 



177 



The Dragon 

A WONDER PLAY 

by 

LADY GREGORY 

Author of 
" Seven Short Plays," "New Comedies," etc. 

"Lady Gregory has written another really 
funny play in * The Dragon/ which is her 
best since * The Workhouse Ward/ It is 
the strangest mixture of ancient and modern 
fun ever concocted, and only Lady Gregory 
could piece the thing together and make 
it ' stageable.' I have not heard so much 
genuine hilarity at the Abbey for years. 
There are no dull moments in this strange 
conception." — A Dublin Review. 



G. P. PUTNAM'S SONS 
New York London 



The Bad Man 

A Novel 

By 

Charles Hanson Towne 

Based on the Play by 
Porter Emerson Browne 

Who has not heard of this delightful 
Bad Man? For many months he has 
been seen in the theatre; now he is 
captured between the covers of a book. 
Here he is. Shake hands with him. 
Get to know him. He is the best com- 
panion you could find for a quiet hour 
or two. The novel is as exciting as 
the play. 

G. P. Putnam's Sons 

New York London 

n 8? 89 «m 



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